Turning Points

crossroad-path-in-lavender-meadow1“At every turning point of my life, I can see your smiling face and my teary eyes.” -SB

Googled “Life Turning Points” and this is what came up: A Turning Point is a critical time in your life where big decisions could lead to big change, both in work and in life.

OR another point of view The idea of turning points in our lives is a powerful one. It’s the idea that at a certain point, a big event happens that changes your life irrevocably. -huffingtonpost

Some turning points are conscious, others less so…But all involve turning away from one path, and towards another. And they shape the self that you experience and define as “you,” along the way. -Psychology today

My husband and his six sisters have been facing a rather big turning point for the past week. There Dad that is 71 has been diagnosed with an extremely rare disease (one in one and a half million people) that is eating his brain at a rapid rate and stealing his life from them. It came out of nowhere and has been a very heavy and tragic time that has humbly brought them together, but has also left them feeling many why’s. They are at a daily turning point of questioning God; wondering why their Dad has to suffer more and more each day; watching people come and go with sorrowful goodbye’s, yet the family still trying to get through the shallow breaths of death each night. He is on the brink of death and at one point just asked them to let him die. It has been dementia on steroids, leaving them all with an empty shell of a man at points, hallucinating the next and then completely lucid. My husband has walked in on him a few times & his body is in motion as if stringing a fishing rod & even biting the line off with his teeth. It is a horrible disease that quickly takes over and it has been a rollercoaster of emotion for everyone.

Each day has been different for each one of the family member’s who stay up all night watching…waiting…wondering when he will take his last breath. They all wonder where he goes when he seems to just be a shell. One day one of his daughter’s who had not slept and was running on a very emotionally empty tank had a psychotic episode and the hospital almost admitted her to the psyche ward for her erratic behavior. She was at a turning/tipping point of her overall experience. She had to step back and have family members force her to sleep, to bring her back to reality, so she could be present as her Dad passes.

The family has been each dealing with their own turning points in different ways. My husband is almost like the father to all of his six sisters. He always has been. He is in the middle of three older and three younger sisters. He is the only boy and they have always relied on him over their own Dad, so nothing is new to him. This is just a different level of a turning point—he is holding their hands each day as they express their feelings, their fears, their needs. His emotional tank is running low, but each day is a turning point of how he will handle each situation with care. He is learning more about himself, more about selfless love, more about unconditional love and servant leadership. I called him and expressed my deep love and appreciation for the man he is & admire how hard he is trying to serve everyone involved. He is better than me. I could not do what he is doing each day.

Turning points have different viewpoints. [Think of yourself standing at a crossroad of two paths–two different viewpoints or life turning points] I may step back from one emotional road & admire how someone else is traveling it. I try to take it in and see it from someone else’s perspective and hope that when I am in the midst of traveling a similar road, that I could handle it with some sort of grace, dignity and selfless action. I can only hope.

Everyone has their journey & each path will be different. BUT Some turning points are conscious, others less so…But all involve turning away from one path, and towards another. And they shape the self that you experience and define as “you,” along the way. -Psychology today

May we each look at each step along our journey and find our best self. May we always seek to learn, grow and strive to be a better version of ourselves along the way.

Peace to all today—Especially my sweet husband and his sisters. Bless you all through this journey. I know it has been a beautiful, but very hard and painful road. xoxoxo

“The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.”  -Max Lerner

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