“Listen to silence. It has so much to say.” Rumi
I was almost living a type of monk life–in a way. [without the meditation 24/7, robes…smile.smile.] No one but me and the dog for months at a time. Besides occasionally hearing from my daughter or friends or family via phone—I have been secluded in my little, beach house all alone. A kind of personal retreat for awhile. I would have background music playing with gorgeous images of places around the world playing on my tv via YouTube. I would work on projects or go on a walk…I have felt so productive…mostly calm. Honestly, sometimes lonely, but I genuinely appreciate the quiet and the alone time.
I think that is why when my daughter came home (from college) to stay for this semester it has been a bit of a challenge juggling our personalities, personal needs, car, time, meals, wants…she wants tv in the background when she works on stuff. I need calm music. It is a time of finding balance. Seeking to find that place within myself where I can exist and be my best.
My daughter and I have been struggling daily with communication, so I teased, “Well, maybe I will take a vow of silence.” Her response, “that’s stupid.”
Honestly, our time together has had very high, memorable moments of walking on the beach together, driving the coast with the convertible top down on a sunny day listening to fun music, moments laughing at memories… but it has also been a lot of conversations with struggle, frustration, intensity… as she tries to find her wings and break free from me. Often I feel things might be better if I just took a vow of silence…honestly.
That may seem a little extreme, but it got me on the wonderment of the benefits and why, oh why, do monks and highly spiritual people usually find some sort of benefit from periods of SILENCE.
Think about it! What happened to the slower times where people would get lost in the silence of washing clothes & hanging them on the line outside, or doing dishes by hand, raking leaves, planting flowers, handwriting letters and cards, reading the paper, ironing a shirt for work…etc. Things use to be a slower time. Silence was found a little easier in the slow stitches made in creating a quilt or outfit by hand. Today there is more of a rush, not a stillness in the between actions of the day. We are on a constant hum of being busy, checking all media, reading texts, making social posts, cars that drive while we work or watch, as well as work, exercise, school, family, etc.
My daughter just spent a month in France with her boyfriend and his family. She came back talking about how fun it was to wash her clothes and then hang them on a line outside to dry. She had a glimpse of a simpler time–when silence was found more often in the daily chores or activities of our lives.
So, what happened to us? Our society use to have more time in silence, even within the doing. Now, we just rush and move within a greater chaos and feel more overwhelmed, anxious and stressed. We are overstiumlated by technology, scheduled busyness, status, expectation…the list goes on and we are left without those moments of silence that help calm, create, and move us to a greater depth within that opens us to something better and healthier.
So, with the change of our lives I decided to jump in, research SILENCE and share, so here we go… the benefits. the method. the maybe you should think about trying to take a vow of silence for yourself…
A VOW OF SILENCE…even for a day! Begin with an hour.
I am going to begin with an hour and go from there. I think we should all at least experience it for a time.
VOW OF SILENCE: On a basic level it is deciding to just take some time to be silent and not speak. To some people they may look at it as means of protest or of deepening their spirituality.
This study1 suggests that silence causes the most brain and neuron growth of all the sounds in mice.
Silence is indeed golden, and many people choose a vow of silence to go inward or reflect on their communication patterns.
A vow of silence is a commitment to abstain from speaking for a set period. People often undertake vows of silence for spiritual, personal growth, or mindfulness reasons. When you can’t speak for an extended period, it can lead to deeper reflection and awareness of your thoughts and emotions.
-scienceofpeople.com. [great article with some further details https://www.scienceofpeople.com/vow-of-silence/#:~:text=People%20often%20undertake%20vows%20of,%2C%20weeks%2C%20or%20months%20long.]
HOW and WHY
According to Healthline: They contend that even people who aren’t religious or spiritual can experience profound benefits from observing a period of silence, whether it’s for a couple of hours or several weeks.
It is a good way to disconnect [from devices, technology, work, life] to truly connect within and on a higher level
It quiets your mind from the external chatter and helps quiet the internal chatter as well.
It awakens a deeper, innate awareness.
Silence may also help people become more mindful and connected to themselves and others.
“You feel more in touch with the universe and yourself,”… “As a result, you’re more creative, you’re more articulate, you get less angry and your negative emotions take a back seat. You’re more aware of your emotions and what you’re thinking, feeling, and saying.” -Michelle Thielen, Yoga Faith from a Healthline article
The farther you pull back on an arrow, the farther the arrow will go when it’s released. We humans are no different. To go further on the spiritual journey, we need to withdraw from all the senses and sense objects and sit in the cave of our hearts…in silence. -artoflivingretreatcenter.org
HEALTH BENEFITS:
Silence may help your health in several ways, including:
- lowering blood pressure
- improving concentration and focus
- calming racing thoughts
- stimulating brain growth
- reducing cortisol
- stimulating creativity
- improving insomnia
- encouraging mindfulness
one of the benefits is experiencing [silence is] a dopamine reset – being able to create more “pause” between your addictive and reactive tendencies. -myspiritualshenanigans.blog
Silence helps with mental acuity, stress, concentration
The hippocampus—the section of the brain that regulates memory, emotion and learning—is the beneficiary of silence, according to several research studies. In one 2013 study, mice who were given two hours of pure silence each day grew new cells—complete with functioning neurons—in their hippocampus regions. -guideposts.org
Silence can set the stage for the practice of mindfulness, which has a range of mental health benefits. “Being mindful and aware of what is happening in the present moment can reduce anxiety, quiet racing thoughts, and calm the nervous system, says Sarah Kaufman, a licensed master social worker based in New York City. -Psych Central
Promotes Self-awareness: Silence can help increase your self-awareness by giving you the chance to observe and accept your thoughts and feelings without judgment. -Psych Central
SOME GUIDELINES:
HOW LONG: Up to you on length—a day, a week, a month…an hour…you decide.
Just begin—you can begin small with five minutes and grow your practice from there.Take the time that FEELS good to you. Find a quiet space, set a timer for five minutes and get rid of any distractions or external noise. Your mind will race but will eventually find a rhythm and begin to calm and slow. Just breathe.
Try a Daily or Weekly Technology Fast
Instead of reading on your smart phone during lunch, try eating in silence, savoring every bite. Or program your phone to block calls and your computer to “sleep” for a certain period every day; use that time to slow down, breathe deeply and think freely. You might even fast from technology on your day off or all weekend -guidepost
Nature calls Walking in the woods, meandering down quiet streets, strolling down a beach, or sitting on a bench and just listening to the wind…nature has a special space that opens up and welcomes silence.
WHY are you wanting to take a vow of silence for a period of time? You want to practice more of a mindfulness practice? You want to develop better listening skills? You want to reach a higher, personal spiritual place?
Silence empties you and creates space for creativity, joy, purity, and innovation to dawn. -artoflivingretreatcenter.org
HOW long do you desire to be silent for? For an entire day? A few hours. A certain period of days with certain hours to practice silence. A morning? Maybe two days of the month you do a 24 hour silence vow. Do you want to be silent UNLESS someone asks you a question & then you respond. Will you communicate via text or online during this time? Will you be alone or around people during this time? Is it more an all or nothing period OR blocking out specific time during your day? Do you need to take it to a more serious level and sign-up for an actual retreat or scheduled session with a professional? You decide.
A Sample of a Silent Retreat: In a silent retreat, participants take a vow of silence for 3–4 days based on the length or duration of the program. A vow of silence entails. [taken from artoflivingretreatcenter.org]
No gestures or greetings to fellow participants or staff.
No speech or communication through any medium for a given period
No writing or reading
No looking in the mirror
SHARE your plan, so people are aware of what you are trying to do for yourself. Make notecards if necessary to ensure people understand and see your commitment (especially if you are in any social situations–like work)
TOOLS to make your time intentional. Turn your phone off and take the time wo distractions. Do you want to journal during your time? Do you want to take walks in the woods or at the beach? Do you need to plan it as a special hotel occasion? Make time to reflect and ponder feelings, thoughts that come up, self-awareness, inner work that needs to be noticed, etc.
TAKE NOTE observing what is playing on your mind during silence may unlock creative ideas, personal thoughts and prayers, messages to yourself, personal needs or wants…make a note or journal the various feelings that come up
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT…TOO MUCH NOISE. WE NEED SILENCE. Studies report that most adults spend between 3-6 hours a day recreationally on their phone and 3-6 hours at work using their phone. Look around your staff room at the next break and observe the use of phones. When I walk or am at the gym most people have devices in their ears. All this stimulation and information, whether it is auditory or not, is noise to our brains. It is a cultural norm now to be constantly preoccupied, and immersed in noise, information, and diversion. Is there a cost for this constant noise?
Overstimulation or hyperarousal of the brain due to constant information, noise and demands can leave people feeling burnt-out, and anxious and with increased feelings of anxiety, failure, and humiliation, in addition to difficulties with creating boundaries with others3. Continuous noise can affect our mental health, create panic, increase frustration and over time the mind can lose the capacity to concentrate on things 4 Our brains are simply not wired to listen continuously. Cognitively we are listening at a rate disproportionate to our cognitive capacity to process and pay attention. https://www.stemlynsblog.org/the-science-of-silence/
shhh. Breathe. Be still.
Take the time to make space for silence. Our society has created environments that almost indulge in speed, technology and doing. We can only hope that people can begin to see the necessity of space, stillness, and quiet that opens pathways to enhance our brains and lead to more balanced lives. Silence allows us to channel higher awareness, creativity, imagination, dreams… that will open the doors to better health, heartfelt connections, personal clarity, less anxiety and awaken a higher part of ourselves.
shhh. Silence does have so much to say.
Have a beautiful life. Begin today. Be still and listen. Peace, Love and Light to you. xoxo. -H
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