Life Passage

Easter Sunday to be exact we put my fifteen year old daughter behind the wheel of our Durango and her Dad gave her the first driving lesson of many. I videoed it & my daughter’s expressions were priceless. She was NOT having a good time.

After the lesson we drove over to harts gas station and my husband ran inside to buy celebratory treats. I looked at my daughter in the back seat and she became a little emotional. I asked her what she was feeling & it was so genuinely sweet. She said, “I didn’t like driving because it makes me feel like I am getting older. I don’t want to be a teenager.”  I told her that she would never be a typical teen because that is not who she is. I explained how driving is just a right of passage in a way. I explained how you have to grow in life. You have to do things that help you fly, that help you learn. I talked about how the butterfly has to go through hard things, to struggle, to break free from its ‘chrysalis’ to be able to fly. We talked about how it is not a bad thing to learn and grow. I reiterrated that she would never be a typical teen. It was a very sweet conversation.

Life is like that! You go from one growth challenge to another to another. Life should be a passage, a passage to better things that help us grow to become better people.

I LOVE that idea–a passage. The definition of ‘rites of passage’ points that mark transitional periods in a person’s life, such as birth, puberty, marriage, having children, and death. Rites of passage usually involve ritual activities and teachings designed to strip individuals of their original roles and prepare them for new roles. -dictionary.com

We all go through life changes and challenges. We go through tough things that make us feel uncomfortable, that challenge our current belief systems. Without those challenges how would we truly grow??

My only issue is that life is FULL of change and rites of passage, but I am going to go with LIFE ‘PASSAGE’ (instead of rites of passage) which is the action or process of passing from one place, condition or stage to another. I think this is more accurate in terms of life. The whole life. We don’t just have children and stop growing until we die. There is a huge portion of life within that realm. I think as adults we do more growing as we parent, as we age, as we continue to find our place as adults.

My question—as adults how can we find those specific ‘life passages’ that we personally need to challenge us to growth? We can easily become stagnate as adults, so how do we continually grow?? Here are my thoughts, research and findings….

life-begins-at-the-end-of-your-comfort-zone-quoteBREAK OUT OF YOUR ORDINARY MOLD: Dr. Elizabeth Lombardo, Psychologist and author of “Better Than Perfect, says people who regularly seek out fresh experiences tend to be more creative and emotionally resilient than those who remain stuck in routine.

“Breaking your own mold can only make you stronger and more confident to reach higher levels in your professional and personal life,” she says.  

How to break out of the ordinary–Do everyday things differently–(unplug on a specific day or time. Brush your teeth standing on one leg. Try a new recipe. etc) Pick a big goal–(to write a book. to run a marathon. to climb a mountain. to read five books in a month. to start a business. etc) Do something physically challenging–(take a trapeze class. go ice skating. take a rock climbing class. certify as a yoga instructor. train for something. etc)

Benefits of breaking out–Optimal anxiety is that place where your mental productivity and performance reach their peak. Still, “increased performance” and “enhanced productivity” just sound like “do more stuff.” What do you really get when you’re willing to step outside of your comfort zone? You’ll be more productive. You’ll have an easier time dealing with new and unexpected changes. You’ll find it easier to push your boundaries in the future. You’ll find it easier to brainstorm and harness your creativity. -lifehacker

 

1823516-Ginni-Rometty-Quote-I-learned-to-always-take-on-things-I-d-neverEMBRACE DISCOMFORT: That is how you truly grow. It is a catalyst for progress! “The days you are most uncomfortable are the days you learn the most about yourself.” -Mary Bean

This is an interesting idea: In an interview with Outside, Karnazes makes an important point that many of us have forgotten:

Western culture has things a little backwards right now. We think that if we had every comfort available to us, we’d be happy. We equate comfort with happiness. And now we’re so comfortable we’re miserable. There’s no struggle in our lives. No sense of adventure. We get in a car, we get in an elevator, it all comes easy. What I’ve found is that I’m never more alive than when I’m pushing and I’m in pain, and I’m struggling for high achievement, and in that struggle I think there’s a magic.

That is a very interesting take from a serious Ultramarathon runner. BUT, we can look at this and equate it to our own lives. We strive to be comfortable, but I bet if any one person looked at their life to pinpoint their greatest times of personal growth, it would be in times of challenge and pain. We don’t grow in comfort. We are just comfortable. We may need to set some challenging or daunting personal goals.

 

1249822-Joe-Vitale-Quote-A-goal-should-scare-you-a-little-and-excite-you-aSET A BIG GOAL: “Don’t shrink from discomfort. Instead, let it guide you toward accomplishment.”  -Michael Hyatt

Goals make you ask a big question, “WHY?” If you can answer why you are doing something then you will see the vision behind your goal and the reason you feel compelled to move forward. Then you can ask, “How?” & begin on that part of the solution. Goals have a way of getting you in the right frame of mind to go beyond your current state.

“If you are bored with life, if you don’t get up every morning with a burning desire to do things–you don’t have enough goals.”  -Lou Holtz

Here are some great resources on creating goals: These should give you a good starting point for ideas. Make your own life list, 100 goals in 100 days, 100 goals in 10 years, it is your life–you make the plan!!

Jack Canfield has “101 Lifetime Goals” http://jackcanfield.com/blog/my-101-lifetime-goals-list-and-why-you-should-have-one-too/

Most important goals according to these ranks https://www.ranker.com/list/most-important-life-goals-list/samantha-dillinger

Another guy’s list of 100 Life Goals https://fullylived.com/100-life-goals-list/

There are MANY ideas from a variety of bloggers—google some ideas, take ideas you like and make your own list to help you live the life you want!

 

2570853-Sugata-Mitra-Quote-Ask-BIG-questions-find-BIG-answers.jpgTAKE SOME TIME TO ASK SOME BIG QUESTIONS: Take a weekend getaway or a day while you are on vacation. Maybe you take just a day alone to sit with yourself and ask some life questions. Use the time to get a renewed perspective of where you are and where you want to be. Ask yourself, “What inspires me?” “What have I learned from past mistakes or failures–what life lessons have I learned” “What do I value?” “Am I truly grateful?” “What are three things I need to look closer at in my life & work on?” “What am I the most afraid of?” “If I had a magic wand, what would I wish for? (no limitations)”  “What do I need in my life to grow?” “How strong is my self-worth & do I truly care about my needs?” “Is there something I enjoy doing that I don’t take enough time to do it more often?” “When do I feel most vulnerable?” “What am I the most proud of in my life?” “What am I focusing the majority of my time on in my life?” “Do I feel passion?” “What do I need at this moment in my life?”

 

72066-Chuck-Palahniuk-Quote-This-is-the-biggest-mistake-I-could-thinkSHAKE IT UP! Your environment, the foods you eat, the same people you surround yourself with, your daily routines, all add to states of comfort and stagnation. Take some time to shake things up–look on Groupon or a local activity sites to see if there is something fun to do to shake up your routine. Try something new each week (a new meal, a new work outfit, surprise someone with a lunch picnic during your work break, find a new way to work, learn a new recipe, listen to a different style of music (Alexa has all kinds of play lists), a new workout, join a club that you are interested in, etc.

 

Quotes About Improving Your Life Robin S. Sharma Quote “Investing In Yourself Is The BestINVEST IN YOU! Are you doing something/anything for you? Take a class, learn a new skill or talent. Is there something you have always wanted to do or try?? Is there a book you have been wanting to read, but have not made the time. Is there an exercise class you have wanted to try? Is there something you can do/learn to boost your confidence? Is there a craft class you have been wondering about? Have you always wanted a monthly massage? Is there a workshop or seminar you have been interested in?Are you following & listening to your heart? Are you taking care of your health? Are you choosing things that make you feel happy?

Why is investing in yourself so powerful? Investing in yourself, sends a powerful message to yourself and the world. The message is:The value and potential that I possess, is important enough to me that I’m going to give it the energy, space and time to grow and create results.  -huffington post

When you are taking time to do something for yourself, everyone around you benefits. You feel more alive, awakened, challenged, rejuvenated…investing in you is a win. win.

 

738837-William-Shatner-Quote-I-am-curious-about-many-things-and-find-the.jpgFIND AWE: The feelings you get from standing in a grove of trees, looking up into a starry night sky, having a space or feeling that seems to transdend. This is one strong human emotion. Many studies showed that people who frequently experience awe tend to have lower levels of a substance that’s been linked to stress and poor health. As part of a recent two-part study at the University of California, Berkeley, students filled out a questionnaire describing their feelings over the past month and submitted samples of their saliva to test for a substance linked with stress in the body. The students who said they’d recently experienced feelings of awe were more likely than students who hadn’t to have lower levels of the stress-linked substance (called interleukin-6) in their spit. In fact, the more often a student said they’d experienced awe in the past month, the lower his or her levels of the substance tended to be (More on the details of the study and its findings here). -businessinsider article

Awe-inspiring moments take us to a deeper place and help us realize that we are part of something so much bigger than ourselves. How to look for daily experiences of awe: being moved by music, looking at the light of the world & seeing the shadows, repetitive patterns in nature, finding the sacred in quiet moments, noticing the colors changing, seeing someone have a giving heart.

Here is a great article that talks more in-depth about the emotion of awe.  https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/why_do_we_feel_awe

 

Well, I hope this is a good start for your personal Life Passage. Life should be cherished.

-Peace and Love to you today.  -H

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Stories to Inspire from the Olympics

I think the various stories from the Olympics send messages of HOPE, INSPIRATION and a spirit of NEVER GIVING UP!! I am going to fill this post with articles, videos, commercials, anything I can find that stirs the soul and screams GREAT!! Enjoy.

 

RedGerard-oly2018-xxxxxx-1-1RED: Well, right out of the gate was the incredible slope style snowboard run of the young, 17-year-old Red who came from behind to win GOLD for USA. It was amazing to watch!! If you have not seen the finals–google it & enjoy. It was an amazing competition.

Here is something GREAT I found.  What he is ‘grateful’ about…

 

olympics-opening-ceremony-c8082a19facea803PITA: Someone else I was impressed with—“The Shiny guy that walks with the flag.” There is definitely more to Pita Taufatofua. I watched an interview with him & was SO impressed with his Olympic spirit of NEVER GIVE UP, I had to learn more.

Here is an AWESOME article on his journey to the Rio Olympics and then his one year challenge to make it to the winter olympics. It is a great story!! Great guy!! https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/early-lead/wp/2018/02/09/the-well-oiled-tongan-from-rio-is-in-pyeongchang-and-still-well-oiled/?utm_term=.7e03f87d57d5

 

5a813f348e689.imageNORWAY: I also LOVED seeing the ‘Come from behind’ “Norway’s Miracle on Snow” story. Check out the story in this video link http://www.nbcolympics.com/video/miracle-snow-relive-kruegers-epic-gold-performance

 

hannah-marissa-brandt-2018-olympics-1600OLYMPIC SISTERS: How cool is this story about two sisters, playing the same sport, but for different countries. The history, the love, the friendship…https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/winter-olympics-2018/2018/02/08/hannah-marissa-brandt-sisters-olympic-hockey-tournament/322498002/

 

Hope you enjoyed those great stories, but Olympic ads are always enjoyable too. Here are a couple I have been inspired by so far. Enjoy.

 

 

Well, that is all for today. I hope these stories of inspiration will make your day a little brighter. There are so many good stories, so many people who inspire, so take the time to learn about the Olympians, their stories, their struggles, their triumphs!!

Life is good!!  Peace to you today.  -H

Finding your EXTRAORDINARY

readinglist_findyourextraordinary_0I recently read a great book by Stella & Dot founder & CEO, Jessica Dilullo Herrin. I had seen her on a previously aired Undercover Boss & wanted to learn more about her. She is a remarkable woman with such talent and vision. It was a great read and I thought you may benefit from some of the ‘highlights’ I took away from this read.

Enjoy…

Even if you’ve tried and failed before, have faith! Here’s the paradox: as much as getting off track is human nature, so is getting creative and surviving.

Simply aim to be a bit better every single day. We are all a work in progress.

Okay, so you don’t have to be perfect, or gifted from birth. Anyone can do something extraordinary. Do you ever look around at the world, evaluate your life, and see the way you would like it to be instead of the way it is? That’s all you need to get started. In fact, that desire to wonder what’s possible is what defines your entrepreneurial spirit. You can nurture this side of you into believing you have the power to create change.

Life is determined not by your past or your circumstances but rather by what you choose to do next. The doing is the difference.

Many times in my life when I’ve come to see that whenever I stop focusing one what I don’t have in comparison to others, and just focus on working hard to deserve what I want, I can change my life in the most extraordinary ways.

Another key lesson: you have to push through self-doubt. You have to embrace fear and failure, it’s the only way that extraordinary is made real.

You will always encounter challenges and setbacks on your journey. But the bold remain steadfastly optimistic and always on the lookout for that hidden doorway–because if you think of any road less traveled as too daunting, you will never even begin the journey to an extraordinary destination.

There is a how-to video on YouTube for just about anything! It’s not the how to do it that’s missing in most people; it’s the confidence and motivation to actually do it.

Mark Twain said it best. “There are two very important days in your life. The day you were born, and the day you figure out why.”

Too many people worry about how qualified they have to be to begin on a path. Too many people worry that their circumstances and knowledge don’t qualify them for taking the next step. But, actually, it’s the steps that qualify you.

I can tell you, I see far more people succeeding because they have focused on believing in themselves rather than being too worried about their lack of expertise to begin.

I find that people often procrastinate or keep spinning their wheels on superfluous tasks out of fear–a fear of moving forward into the unknown. People get stymied by fear of failure or rejection and by stranger danger. Be honest with yourself about what’s really going on if you are thinking too long and embrace the idea that forward momentum is essential.

Great ideas are worthless without action.

Better to hop on the 80 percent right train and get somewhere than stand alone at the station waiting for the perfection train to come along. Its not coming. It must have gotten into a crash with the Polar Express.

Become the leader you want to follow. Regardless of your current role or position, you are always leading the people around you.

I know that I am my greatest source of strength, but I also know that I shine brighter when I turn the light on others.

When I have had the privilege of meeting highly successful people and learning about their lives, I can’t help but note just how many have had to overcome personal hardships that required them to be resilient. They are successful not because they never faced adversity, but because in that moment of hardship they dove into the well of their own strength.

The more you tap into your well of strength, the deeper it gets.

Well, There is SO much more to this book–goal setting, time management, GREAT STORIES, leadership, Self, and more. This was a little sample of her greatness! It is a great read and highly recommended. She has her own great story that she has made & continues to make even better. Take the time to learn from others. It is an incredible personal investment in finding your own extraordinary.

-Peace and Love to you today.  -H

SOUL SEEKERS: Thoughts by Sue Monk Kidd

maxresdefault-2I just watched a Super Soul Sunday with Oprah interviewing Sue Monk Kidd and wanted to share a few of my highlights from it. Enjoy!

Sue Monk Kidd has a unique story–mother, wife, nurse–the “safe life” and when she turned 30 she felt a deeper calling and purpose. She then announced to her family, “I am going to be a writer.” She wrote for years and at the age of 53 had a NY Best Seller from her book, The Secret Life of Bees, which was a best seller for more than 2 years & sold over 6 million copies.

I have not read any of her books, but her interview was inspiring. I am sure I will pick up her book to understand her even more. The BOLD quotes below were from the interview with Sue Monk Kidd. I then follow those up with my own thoughts about the quotes.

At one point in her life she read the works of Thomas Merton and his words really meant something deeper to her. It made her seek beyond herself and her religion.

 

7205282830_d87f20552e_b“The attention of the heart is truly what prayer is.”     I liked this thought because you can see how true it is. If you find wonder in the symmetry of leaves or the shadows of a tree, you can get lost in the lines of nature and become calm. OR, you can get lost in the attention of the world and not find peace, but noise and distraction. Where you place your attention does matter.

 

favim-com-23027“We are always seeking a place of belonging.”     I could relate to this thought because so much of my life was spent in a religion that is very tribe like. When I decided to seek my own path, it has been my path that I have had to find my own sense of personal belonging and freedom. I have not had to place my beliefs or my place in the hands of others. It is my space. My place.

 

4“Something that brings us alive, pay attention to that.”     We are all seekers of things that make us come alive, that fill us with excitement, that give us that sense of wholeness and purpose.  When you begin to learn something new, to find a new direction, there is something that comes alive within us and and we want more.

 

10-reasons-every-girl-should-study-abroad-4-1473842587“There is no place so awake and alive as the edge of becoming.”   I think we can all relate to this thought because we have had moments, inspiration, thrill as we stand on the edge of an idea, a dream, a newness, a becoming. You feel so alive!

 

rumi-voice-words-listen-2s5j.jpg_thumb_600w-square“Listen to the yearning within.”     I think we all need to get to that point where we truly listen within and wait patiently for direction, answers, inspiration and have a faith that we will begin to hear the yearnings of our heart.

 

pic-Love-Heart-Hands“Ask for the thing that lies at the bottom of your heart.”    I think as we begin to truly listen within, we will get deeper and deeper to the true knowing that lies at the bottom of our hearts. We have deeply innate knowing of a greater divineness that is held deeply within our hearts. It is the greatest gift, if we can learn to unbury it.

 

635836773350119896432457799_who-am-i-1024x575“Who am I?” Oprah shared how she was asked to answer this question and it took her a few days to really take it in and answer—NOT the labels she has or the labels the world has given her.     Sue then shared a similar experience—all the labels of the external self vs the TRUE inner self. She said, ‘maybe that is the point to life, to discover that part, to align with it, become more a part of it.”

 

thank-you-1“Always seek, but always acknowledge when you find something.”     This was a very true point for me. I have been a seeker for most of my life & I hear this thought & know I have not taken the appropriate time to say THANK YOU for the many gifts I have been able to Seek & Find. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

 

St.-Clair-Beach-Sunrise-8She quoted William Wordsworth saying we need “spots of time” to remember we are holy, this is divine.     I like the idea of having “spots of time” throughout your day to get quiet, to remember the holy reverence that is life.

 

862-03808243“We truly become what we pay attention to. If we pay attention to our fears, worries…that becomes our life.”     This is a good reminder for all of us to pay attention to what you truly pay attention to.  Are your days filled with worry and regret? or are your days filled with gratitude and love? Listen to the words you say, the thoughts you think and what energy you are putting out into the world. We truly do affect our lives & those around us. What are you focusing on?

 

45biglovequotesrefurbOprah then did a Q&A:

O: Point of Life.    SMK: to LOVE and CREATE

O: What you know for sure.   SMK: Just to BE is HOLY. Just to LIVE is a GIFT.     BEAUTIFUL.

Hope you were able to take something good from the highlights of this interview. I LOVE learning and sharing. We can learn from everything and everyone!!

Have a beautiful day. -H

 

 

 

 

Great Life Tips

my-life-is-greatI am going through the notes on my phone because usually I use this tool to save anything of interest, quotes to keep, things to remember. It is a great resource of useful tidbits of information from many places. I hope you find something here useful. enjoy.

Wow!! Only 7% of what we say is part of our communication. Non verbal communication is the majority of how we communicate. What are you saying with your body language?

True nobility is about being better than you use to be.

“Be faithful to that which exists nowhere else but in yourself.” -French Poet (Wayne Dyer carried this thought with him in his pocket)

We are often addicted to being “BUSY”–we may even put some of our worth in this. We “hideout” in being busy to avoid “FEELING” or dealing with what is really going on inside.

If you knew who walks beside you–on this path that YOU have chose, you could never experience fear or doubt again [taken from Wayne Dyer movie series]

“To worry is to pray from something you really don’t want.” -[Sharon Lechter podcast]

It is a matter of changing your focus to what you do want & to refocus your thought to get rid of the worry.

The word “VICE” is in the word “ADVICE”–it must be there for a reason. It often gives the person on the other end the feeling that you think they don’t know what they are doing. You try to fix and fix with the “ADVICE” since you think you have all the answers.

“Have faith that the world needs what you got.” -Danielle LaPorte

“Your word is your wand. The words you speak create your own destiny.” -Florence Shinn

Abundance is Everywhere!

From a podcast with Jen Louden and Koren M: Jen reminded the listeners that we are animals and there is a part of our brain that when it senses fear or anxiety it goes into the flight or fight mode. She also said–we are prey and we are prayers. It reminded me that no matter what stress or weakness, fear or anxiety comes, we don’t have to be prey, but that we can pray. I like that.

May the path that would serve us best be very CLEAR.

Interesting thought from Martha Beck–She heard a client say “deep rest” when they were expressing feelings of being “depressed” Martha say’s it is a sign of your body and soul that you need nourishment and a deeper level of a deeper rest.

Jonathan Fields ask, “Who can I help today?”  [he was a Lawyer & now Yogi]

Ask yourself, “How has your light been dimmed?” What events (stories) stick with you from your life that seem to dim your divine light? What do you feel in those situations? Why does it still come up for you?? What are your suppose to learn? Why are you immobilized, afraid, stopped, stuck?

“The nuns taught us that there are two ways through life, the one of nature, the other grace.” -Tree of Life

“Make your future dream a present fact by assuming the feeling of the wish fulfilled.” -Neville

“Free will is whether we choose to align with Gods will or not!!” -W Dyer

“No matter what obstacles life gives you. Know you are worthy of love and belonging. No matter what! Life gives us moments of imperfection. We just need to remember and know we are worthy of love and belonging.”  -Brene Brown

A beloved community–What would you bring to the earthly table? What would you bring to nourish the souls of those around you? What richness would be fulfilled? What would you give to enrich their lives?

The crown is in my heart, not on my head. -Shakespeare

“Invitation” vs “Obligation”–there is a different energy when people are there because they want to be.

Post-it commercial states that if you write something down you are 42% more likely to do it.

Hope you find something here to take with you during your day. Life is about getting better each day & when you place something [a quote, a thought, a meaning] within your heart you make it more valuable and more meaningful.

Have a beautiful day.  -H

 

Olympic Spirit

“Strength and Courage aren’t always measured in medals and victories. They are measured in the struggles they overcome. The strongest people aren’t always the people who win, but the people who don’t give up when they lose.”  -Ashley Hodgeson

Every Olympic games I truly enjoy the P & G videos that have inspiring Olympic Stories, so I want to post some of them here. Hope you feel the Olympic Spirit of determination within these videos. Enjoy.

 

 

 

A few more stories to inspire…

Uber-kind stranger helps dad see his son’s debut at the Games

One of sweetest stories so far is that of Ellis Hill, the father of shot putter Darren Hill, was not even going to go to the Olympics. Travelling for mega sporting events is expensive and Hill, who drives an Uber taxi in Philadelphia, was going to have to settle for watching his son on TV. But that all changed when he mentioned to one of his passengers that he wouldn’t be able to go. The Good Samaritan decided to crowd-fund to get him there.

“It was devastating to hear that,” said the passenger, Liz Willock, in an interview with People magazine. “Here’s this wonderful man, who has a close relationship with his son, and I know any parent would want to see their son or daughter compete at the Olympics, but it was very understandable how that could be out of reach.” [taken from Daily Maverick]

 

Yusra Mardini might be the only athlete in the world whose sport literally saved her life.

The Syrian refugee, who will compete for the newly created Refugee Olympic Team, was forced to flee her home country because of civil war. With her sister, she went from Lebanon to Turkey with plans to sneak into Greece via the Aegean Sea, according to Juliet Spies-Gans of the Huffington Post.

During the trip, her boat broke down and began to fill with water. Along with another refugee, Mardini and her sister jumped into the Aegean Sea and pushed the boat to land. A month later, Mardini and her sister went to Berlin.

Mardini has always been a talented swimmer, but circumstances in Syria made training difficult at times.

In Berlin, she was able to begin training with Wasserfreunde Spandau 04, a swimming club that is based near her refugee center, according to the official Olympics website. There, she would train in a pool that was built for the 1936 Olympic Games.

Mardini hopes she will inspire others, according to the Olympics website:

I think my target is to qualify for the Olympics and to be an inspiration for everyone.

I want everyone to stay strong for their goals in life, because if you have your goals in front of your eyes, you will do everything you can; and I think even if I fail I will try again. Maybe I will be sad, but I will not show it, and I will try again and again until I get it. I want to show everybody that it’s hard to arrive at your dreams, but it’s not impossible. You can do it; everyone can do it. If I can do it, any athlete can do it.

She competes in the 200-meter individual medley, 200 freestyle and 400 freestyle events [taken from bleacher report.com]

 

Well, I hope these stories inspire your day and your life. Don’t give up!

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