Holiday HOPE for adults

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  • childhood magic and wonder
  • quality time
  • experiences
  • playful
  • family time

For some reason this year has been a struggle to get into the holiday cheer. My usual excitement and enthusiasm is lagging. It is like I am the slow, color wheel on my computer screen. I keep waiting and waiting to be lit up by the Holiday cheer! My favorite thing so far this year…MERRY EVERYTHING AND HAPPY ALWAYS! That has been my new motto. More than ever I see the vast differences in other people’s holiday celebrations. My daughter’s boyfriend grew up in an Indian household, so for Christmas his mom wanted him to have something fun and somewhat normal so she would put up the tree and give gifts because everyone around them would. Our friends and neighbors are the usual “pick out something off my Amazon wish list, wrap it up & act surprised.” or gift each other the same amount of money each year to buy annual movie tickets to the same theater. WHAT!? Why is it that so much magic gets erased as we age into adults?

At our house the holidays have always been over-the-top gift exchanges, activities, giving, sharing…but for some reason, this year FEELS a bit off. That is NOT like me. I am definitely Miss Santa at our house. I LOVE traditions, wrapping, planning, creating…definitely finding intentional gifts, so what is different this year?

My thoughts and reflections go to—the adult weights or living, dying, money, responsibilities…real life…I am thinking about my brother’s kids who lost their Dad six months ago & how this will be their first Christmas without him. Or my neighbor who was just put into a home & it will probably be her last Christmas. Another neighbor’s husband is & has been battling cancer & doesn’t know if this is his last or my husband’s boss who just found out he has stage four cancer & this will be his last Christmas with his family…the holidays are such a gift & yet for many it can be a heavier time of heartache, loneliness, loss. The holidays are not all cheer for everyone. For some reason I am VERY mindful of this, this year.

How can we help? How can we bring a little CHEER & Holiday Hope to places that need a boost of some kind? How can we find ways to bring about Holiday spirit? How can we as adults create a little more Holiday magic?

Be a LIGHT. I never would have thought how moving to a coastal town that does not have very many houses lit up or festive lights, how much I would miss it. So, I ordered hundreds of feet of lights and I am determined to bring on some light to my neighborhood. HOPING everyone who drives by can enJOY a little bit of the holiday cheer.

Other ways to spread light…giving and sharing…do an angel tree, fix up used toys and give to needy families (this is a tradition at our house. We buy used Kelly or Chelsea Barbie dolls and buy $1 store accessories, add a love note, a candy cane & donate to local charities) maybe make cards or take a plant or flower to an elderly home for each resident, give someone in your neighborhood (who has health issues & may not have another holiday) a special dinner or advent or homemade gift that says you care, give thank you notes or a gift to your UPS delivery drivers (I usually leave out some fun candy bars and thank you notes), thank you’s to your pet providers or stores you frequent, DON’T forget the single people around you—sometimes they need someone to just connect & feel that it is a different day & not just a day off. Reach out…help a local organization feed families or make a difference in some way by giving back.

Put some MAGIC back into the season…even as an adult: Think of traditions you loved as a child. At my house our family did a train where each kid stood at their door and my Mom & Dad had a wooden train whistle they would blow & chug to each kids room and everyone would link and make our way down to the tree. One idea from this: Maybe if you have grown children that don’t live at home & are close by, you swing by their apartment & honk a number of times until they come out & you wisk them to your home for a special breakfast Christmas morning or brunch.

Another fun childhood memory—waiting up all night for presents or sleeping under the tree. One idea from this: could be to have a special slumber party with your adult kids sometime during the holidays. Have everyone bring pillows, blankets, sleeping items & camp out under the tree watching holiday classics.

Another fun childhood memory—games. Whether it was board games like Pictionary, candy land, twister or find the pickle on the tree, games can make the holidays fun! At our house, with adult kids I made an especially hard I-spy on the tree. I hid multiple tiny penguins, polar bears, stars, shells, tiny toys, special ornaments, etc. It was so fun to see three, college-age visitors hunt up and down and all around the Christmas tree trying to spy the various items. See what you can find—thimbles, buttons, the items can be endless & can be hidden exceptionally well. It can be a lot of fun! OR pull out board games and have a game night with fun soda mixed beverages, s’mores or a hot cocoa bar. Make it a fun memory.

Another childhood memory—advent calendars. As a kid it would be full of chocolate or candies, tiny toys, etc. As kids get older gift them ideas they can do to enJOY the holidays, experiences to do, opportunities to serve the community, little acts of random kindness, etc. Last year I gave my daughter a little tip to do each day to learn to love herself more. This year there are tips of living an intentional life with little chocolates. It doesn’t have to be a physical gift, but something they can learn and grow from too. A gift should be something that is given with intention and care.

Another childhood memory—visiting lights, so maybe to create some adult magic–have a light up contest within the family. Everyone gets the same kit with a certain amount of lights, ornaments, etc & they can only use $30 of their own money to create some type of holiday display. Everyone gets creative & then one night you have everyone caravan to each house to see the display & pick an overall winner. OR you just have a special night where the family gathers and caravans to certain locations of magical lights & has hot cocoas in hand.

Another childhood memory—sleigh rides or snow tube rides. I remember as a kid my Dad would hook a rope to the car (please don’t try this at home. ;), attach a large tube and neighbor kids would zip through an iced over parking lot—many flying from a snow mound jump & a few falling through the inter tube hole into a thick powder. It was so fun!! As an adult we took a neighborhood path and packed the snow up from it and made it into a tube luge. We had cousins & neighbors over & created a big memory that we still talk about. As an adult—still go! Jump in and book a sleigh ride under a moonlit sky, buy a huge tube and make a snow run…make the memories that continue to last! We are all just BIG kids.

Another childhood memory—one of my all-time favorite gifts was a stuffed polar bear (that I still have). I still buy myself a stuffed animal every year for Christmas. Is there a beloved gift you would love to see and experience again? Maybe you loved trains or playing with blocks or magnets or dolls. Maybe you always wanted to take pictures or paint. Tap into things you enJOYed as a child and buy yourself something or invite someone to gift you something that reminds you of your youth. Take a walk down that memory lane and remember the magic.

Another childhood memory—Christmas books. The classics, the ones that were gifted. Books are a holiday memory. As an adult think of a book or series that might be fun to read alone or with your family (Harry Potter, Skipping Christmas–movie Christmas with the Kranks) and take a few pages each night before bed. I came across this site that seems to have an extensive list of ideas that may help you find something inspired to read for the holidays. https://www.julesbuono.com/best-holiday-christmas-books-adults/

Another childhood memory—Christmas movies. This is a classic Christmas tradition no matter how old you are. You have those shows that stick with you & are your favorites from your youth (Rudolph, Polar Express, Santa Claus, Elf) or the more modern classics that have great lessons to share (Family Man, Family Stone, Serendipity, Christmas Jars)

Another idea: The holidays are a fun time to truly create memories, so take time to make things intentional. My daughter & her boyfriend are coming home for the weekend & it is a tradition to kick off December with some sort of gift or display that helps bring some magic. When she was little it also meant that our little “Star” bear (many have elf on the shelf now) would arrive and be on Christmas watch. Well, now she is in college, but the magic is still important, so I planned a fun scavenger hunt for the two of them to do together with a fun gift at the end. I also found another “Star” bear that is holding a penguin, which is more like her adult self. I am going to hide it around the house & bring back a little magic from her youth. Kids & adults are never too old to enJOY intentional gifts that make memories fun.

Thoughtful SURPRISES: I LOVE thoughtful surprises. My husband over the years has given me so many nice gifts (cameras, laptop) but the thought filled gifts & surprises always mean the most—from a surprise kayak at a hotel pool that I paddled around in, or a kaleidoscope from a beach town we had visited, to a small, redwood tree seed encased in acrylic to a stuffed donkey—all things that he felt would resonate with me as a person. Often enough my favorite, thought-filled gifts that I cherish–are a card with heartfelt words and sentiment. When someone puts thought into something—priceless. My daughter’s boyfriend just got a 3-d printer & the first thing he thought about…something he could make her. He made her a darling Christmas sign to hang in her apt. When thought is there—it shows you care.

Find GRATITUDE & be grateful for ALL the gifts of Christmas and the daily gifts you receive. If you can find blessings daily through the holidays—it will make it that much better. Find appreciation and good will to men. Send love texts, share pictures with family, send love notes of appreciation for those in your life. Gratitude can change everything. Give thanks for the lights, the food, the family gathered, friends, people who pop in, holiday music, all you have been given. What you focus on you will find.

SELFLESS: I read this and can find admiration and truth in this.. I enjoy Christmas so much more as an adult because it’s not about me and my expectations. I can’t possibly be bored or disappointed, because I’m not hoping to get anything out of it. Now, Christmas is about celebrating my faith and practicing gratitude. It’s about specifically focusing on the people in my life that I love instead of myself, doing things for them that let them know how special they are .-comment by Megan Skipworth. [love that! thank you, Megan] so true. Love that focus.

The holidays are about HOPE, HEART, HAPPY MEMORIES, so with the holidays here, think about what brings you JOY, what fills your heart with giving, what makes you genuinely hopeful about your life, your family, the time you share & ultimately the greatest gift giving time you care.

Peace, Love and Light. -H

xoxo

Connection

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Sadly, I think a very human tendency is to judge. We get into habits of people watching and noticing and…seeing what WE think is. Well, I LOVE situations that challenge any moment of judgement.

My husband and I were stopping to get gas and an attendant was walking up. An older man with long, straggly, grey hair, long beard, tattoos, huge ear gages, lots of jewelry and leather bracelets…he looked like an older member of a biker gang or something. I wasn’t sure how gruff or what temperament we would get. He approached the car. I instantly said, “How are you doing?” He replied optimistically, “No problems!” I smiled, “Wow. [I quickly looked at his name tag] Bronson, where did this attitude come from?” He said, “My grandfather once told me, “Happiness is a choice.” Now I have had a hell of a life, full of trouble. I finally woke up one day and thought that maybe I should take my grandfather’s advice and try happiness. I kept trying and trying until it stuck. I found happiness is a choice.” He beamed and kept at his work.

I quickly shuffled through my purse and pulled out one of my favorite “thoughtful” cards and wrote a little note to our new gas attendant & expressed our gratitude for his great attitude. He genuinely took the card with a smile.

It was such a wonderful moment of connection with a stranger.

I LOVE and appreciate those moments that continually challenge us to be open and just love.

Connection is that gift that is always available—if we take the time to open the door to another.

May we always seek the gifts that are available in another.

“Connecting with others gives us a sense of inclusion, connection, interaction, safety, and community. Your vibe attracts your tribe, so if you want to attract positive and healthy relationships, be one! Staying connected and getting reconnected feeds the flow of goodness which empowers our humanity.”
― Susan C. Young

“I believe connection is needed more today than ever. When we allow ourselves to listen with our hearts we are then able to be truly present.” 
― Debbie Payne

“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.” – Mother Teresa

I hope this little story of connection makes you smile and brings a little happiness to your day.

Connect. Love. Share a smile. Make a friend. Be a gift to someone’s day.

-xoxo H

Good Reads: Build the Life you want

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I was genuinely excited when I heard that Oprah partnered with a Harvard Professor who teaches a course on happiness to write a book. I couldn’t wait to get my hands on it and suck up all the knowledge and wisdom these two, incredible people could put together.

The book, “The Art and Science of Getting Happier…Build the Life you Want” is a great read full of interesting studies and the science nuggets that come from them, as well as personal ideas, thoughts, tools and my favorite…a nudge to get out and share…to become the teacher of this great information.

Some key takeaways for me…or my highlighted parts of the book: [there will be MANY posts. There are too many great things to take away]

ME-SEARCH: In the note at the beginning of the book from Arthur, there was a great point that I think anyone who reads, seeks, looks for deeper depths for living, is on an ongoing search & Arthur lovingly called his years of research and seeking…“me-search.” I LOVE that. It is so true. We are all on this life journey seeking the guidance, the stepping stones that get us further, the path that takes us to our hearts desires…every journey, every path, every tutor, every person we connect with, every story, every influence, every book…is me-search.

May we all continue to seek within, to find the deeper depths of who we are, what lights us up, what calls to our hearts, what stirs to be created, what purpose we need to follow. We are each so uniquely given gifts, talents, guidance and we must take the time to unlock the life combinations that lead us to our final destinations.

YIKES. HAPPINESS SLUMP: “Just over the past decade, the percentage of Americans saying they are “not too happy” rose from 10 percent to 24 percent. The percentage of Americans suffering from depression is increasing dramatically, especially among young adults. Meanwhile, the percentage saying they are “very happy” has fallen from 36 percent to 19 percent. These patterns are seen all over the globe too.”

Wow! those stats were crazy and scary to me. Especially for the young adults. I see it all over my daughter’s college campus. Most people don’t smile and connect like they use to. Many are just plugged into AirPods and walk obliviously past others their same age without any type of smile, wave, hello…connection. It is easier. BUT, It is so disconnecting. Young adults are becoming more and more isolated from the real world and getting stuck in unhealthy patterns that are effecting their lives. My daughter’s boyfriend has two roommates and one has not come out of his room for weeks. He has not met one of his roommates because he just stays in his room all day and all night. One of his old room mates would stay in the dorm all day and drink, game and take opioids to avoid being social. There are so many young adults stuck in a variety of bad patterns.

HAPPINESS: What is it? Many people struggle to build happiness because they don’t even know what they are truly looking for. “In the West, happiness is usually defined in terms of excitement and achievement. Meanwhile, in Asia, happiness is most often defined in terms of calm and contentment. Definitions of happiness depend on the word for it.”

“The macronutrients of happiness are enjoyment, satisfaction, and purpose. The first is enjoyment. This might sound like pleasure—“feeling good.” However, this isn’t correct. Pleasure is animal; enjoyment is completely human.” “Pleasure is easier than enjoyment, but it is a mistake to settle for it, because it is fleeting and solitary. All addictions involve pleasure, not enjoyment. To be happier, you should never settle for pleasure, but rather make it into enjoyment.”

“The Second macronutrient of happiness is satisfaction. Its that thrill from accomplishing a goal you worked for…..While satisfaction can bring a huge amount of joy, it is also extremely elusive; you think that meeting a goal will give you permanent satisfaction, but it is, of course temporary…..This is especially true with worldly things like money, power, pleasure, and prestige (or fame).”

“The third macronutrient is the most important: purpose. We can make do without enjoyment for a while, and even without a lot of satisfaction. Without purpose, however, we are utterly lost, because we can’t deal with life’s inevitable puzzles and dilemmas. When we do have a sense of meaning and purpose, we can face life with hope and inner peace.”

UNHAPPINESS IS NECESSARY: “When we are sad or angry about something, we may be more likely to fix it. And that, of course, leads us to be happier in the long run.” “Regret leads to learning.”

Unhappiness helps us with creativity. “Research found that among great composers like Beethoven, a 37 percent increase in sadness led to, on average, one extra major composition. The reason for this is that when people are sad, they focus on the unpleasant parts of their lives. This tends to stimulate a part of the brain called the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex, which allows us to focus intensely on other complex problems as well—like writing a business plan, or a book, or a symphony—or to figure out a solution to a complicated life problem.”

That is fascinating how unhappiness helps with creativity. That transforms unhappiness to another level, right!?! To me that shares the deeper understanding that even in the moments that sink or seem to lull in life, there is or can be a greater purpose. We may view unhappiness in a new light.

“IF YOU WANT TO MAKE YOURSELF HAPPIER, YOU ALREADY HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO DO SO, WITHIN YOU, AT ANY MOMENT, AT THIS MOMENT, TODAY.” -Oprah

Well, that is all for now. Get the book. Read it. Highlight your own favorites. Books challenge, change, inspire, guide, direct, lead us to greater depths as beings. We should always be striving to live better and build a better life!!

Peace, Love and light to you today. xoxo -H

Little things lesson

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I have this lovely woman who is a neighbor of mine and oh, the lessons I seem to always take from her. Her husband who has been battling cancer with infusions for years just had a birthday. We dropped by a small bag of breakfast (freshly baked muffins, oatmeal, a banana) & some other small gifts. It was a smattering of simple gifts. Not a big deal, but I always try to put some intention into gifts (especially because of his sweet wife)

They go by Patty Peace and Jack Joy. I LOVE THAT SO. They are this incredible twosome that she creates the gifts and letters and he drops them off (in a secret manner). We see them always putting about the neighborhood leaving little notes and packages of JOY and PEACE in all they do. We have received dozens of door drop delights! She makes these sweet, homemade ornaments of magazine clipped words and images, glued on to card stock, whole-punched with a ribbon for hanging and a very thoughtful, handwritten note. She will then add additional notes on folded paper and then specially places them in envelopes decorated with more whimsy or she will add them to a shirt box with folded tissue paper with the lovely contents inside and tied with many colors of curling ribbon. There is always so much time, detail and intention made with every one of her delights. I smile and excitedly open the gifts to see what is inside. Sometimes she will add a scarf, bangle bracelets, maybe a hand lotion, a tiny pkg of Kleenex…Lots of little odds and ends of surprises.

I just now received another one of their sweet delights. I read a thank you letter of gratitude for all the little gifts we left for Jacks birthday. She listed every single little thing. She even thanked us for the banana! “Thank you for the banana so perfectly shaped and tasted so Divine that if there had been a scramble to claim it you would have heard from your house, “it’s mine!” haha

She noticed and gave thanks for every detail—even a small heart-shaped rock we included. She wrote such gratitude with every line of her note. It was the sweetest thing.

I put the note down & said, “I learn so many small things from this wonderful woman!” To hear someone be so grateful for a simple banana. It touched me so. I immediately felt like I can always do better and better. To aspire to be more like Patty Peace.

We talk to people daily. We pass strangers by all the time, we receive gifts of care from neighbors, we share in so many moments with a variety of people…all connections…

may we begin to notice a smile and give thanks. may we leave a secret note for a stranger. may we give thanks for the tiny, small graces that we are gifted each day…like a banana.

I love that!!

Make it a lovely day full of little, sweet surprises that you begin to notice within every detail.

xoxo. -H

ESPRIT

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YOU KNOW I LOVE WORDS

ASPIRE direct one’s hopes or ambitions towards achieving something. Rise high.

ESPRIT the quality of being lively, vivacious, or witty. It’s a French word that’s been used in English since the 16th century, literally meaning “spirit,” “soul,” or “mind,” from the Latin root spiritus, “spirit.” “Esprit.” 

esprit de corps

noun

es·​prit de corps i-ˌsprē-də-ˈkȯr 

: the common spirit existing in the members of a group and inspiring enthusiasm, devotion, and strong regard for the honor of the group

For some reason I am thinking about my brother I just lost almost 4 months ago. We grew up in the 80’s and I will forever have sweet memories of looking at ads of Esprit, United Colors of Benetton, Swatch—all the BRIGHT colors, the fun styles, the happy faces of the people in the ads. For some reason, I had a collection of Esprit ads that were huge images of random people & little bios (like the ad above) of who they were. I LOVED seeing the faces of people and then learning about them, their dreams, who they are, what they want. As a teen, it was so fun to see others aspirations.

ASPIRATIONS

ASPIRATIONS are ongoing. I don’t care how old you become, there are still dreams you hold. Dreams take hold of you with a simple idea and hope the wings of the idea will some day take flight. I love that visual. The dreams within us are always seeking to fly free. They swirl within, they seek your energy and momentum to move them, they dig deeper for your desire and then they help you take off and soar a little higher. Dreams lift you. They help you rise. They are the aspirations of your life.

I look at my neighbor who is 69 and she has someone working on art for a children’s book she has written, she still talks about a play she would like to write. She just called me up to share another story idea that came to her from a visual near the ocean.

I am constantly thinking and dreaming of how to help people with courses I could create, to start a non-profit that just buys acres of trees to save them, to finish a course in Positive Psychology, to write books, create art, help single moms…my lists could go on and on. smile. smile.

I have another neighbor who is in her mid 70’s and she and her husband decided to move to Portugal on a whim. They took a trip there to see if they liked it, sold everything in their home, have been taking Portuguese lessons, had all the lengthy documentation done and are moving there next month!

Every person is different. Every aspiration is different. My husbands dreams may be a bit different than mine. He misses living in our landlocked home state of Utah. I have enjoyed living on the Oregon coast. Yesterday, we were talking to a stranger at a roadside pullout & he was explaining how he had a few business locations & his dream is finally to be here on the coast. I looked at my husband and said, “See how blessed we are. We are already living some people’s dreams.”

Everyone has a variety of dreams that are all their own–whether its having a child, working their dream job, becoming a race car driver, a published author, running a candy shop, speaking at a Ted conference, becoming a chef, building a dream house or living in a specific place. Every aspiration is different for every individual.

So, how can we reach a little higher? How can we take a tiny step toward the sky? I would say, Follow what lights up your “esprit” [soul, spirit]. Evaluate and ask yourself, What brightens or lights you up? What can you include in your daily routine that fills you up with energy? What gets you excited? What ideas keep coming back or wanting your attention?

Are there things you can do to move toward your dream? Think of it like planning a vacation. Where do you want to go? [destination or goal], How can you get there? [variety of options or opportunities to get you from point A to point B], What do you want to do? [action plans or smaller steps to overall idea], create a map of ideas and brainstorm and then go…begin…fly.

Get it on paper. Dreams need a destination, a place to land. If you don’t put your dreams and aspirations on paper with guidelines, direction, goals, dates and determinations, then the dreams will just float along. They need you to grab them, use their wings to propel them to their proper destination.

Give it some brain power—your thoughts definitely have power, so make sure you have a visual plan (vision board of ideas), create a daily mantra to help propel your vision, and always remember how capable and brilliant you are. DONT limit yourself by questioning if you have what it takes to follow and fly to your higher aspirations.

Give aspirations your time–before your life passes you by and your calendar is full. Set a time for your dreams and aspirations. Block some time into your day (like you would exercise) to plan, to create, to work details, to help lift the dream a little higher. Give yourself the time you need to make it fly.

I know for me, when I was interested and creating children’s books I took a class from a published author, went to a local book seminar, met with literary agents, sent my book out…When I was working and dreaming about a musical screenplay, I found a way to contact the woman who wrote the movie Mama Mia to have her share thoughts and lessons learned. [even if the dreams don’t get published, you still have to chase it & do your best with no regrets] there are always avenues to research, people to connect with, actions to take, mentors to make. Dreams and aspirations need you to help them find the way into the world.

What can you learn that will help your aspiration grow? Is there a skill you could learn that would help your confidence in pursuing something? Is there a mentor or class you could take to help you learn more about chasing a particular dream.

Just begin. If you have an internal argument about waiting to start because of timing, bills, kids, etc. you will always find some type of excuse that will stop you from beginning. Think about one small step and begin there. The momentum of any idea needs to have the space and energy to grow into something greater.

Best, heartfelt wishes for your dreams and aspirations.

May you find your wings that will take you higher and higher.

xoxo -H

Inspired Notes

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Life is a funny combination of so many little things.

I enJOY looking at my phone notes to see the variations of interest, thought processes, things that catch my attention or stir my heart in some way. Every now and then I like to compile them here—for my very own sake. Somewhere I can look back and dance with the little notes that make up tiny bits of things that make me, me. We all grow and learn from everything around us–the stories we hear, the songs we listen to, the quotes that stir our soul, the texts from friends…a combinations of so many little things. Hope you can find something here that speaks to YOU.

Be of conviction that you are…

I AM HAPPY WITH ME.

……………….

Fitting in is the opposite of belonging

-Brene Brown

Love that!!

Belonging is belonging to yourself first. Speaking your truth, being you and never betraying that

True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are. It requires you to be who you are…and that is vulnerable.

There is NO COURAGE WO VULNERABILITY. 

Talk to yourself like someone you love.  -Brene Brown

………………….

100 Ideas For Play Dates or Artist Dates

Play dates or artist dates are essential for creative thinking. But as adults, we can forget how to play. Here are 100 ideas to start with. Great list of activities to do https://thecreativelife.net/100-ideas-for-play-dates/loop

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Besos means kisses in Mexican culture

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I love you more than Ice cream and that’s saying a lot….Frigophilia is the love/obsession towards cold or frosty stuff!

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JUST SMILE

“Sometimes, all it takes is your smile (even if forced) and a domino effect of smiles happen… infectious.”

– Ace Antonio Hall.

……………….

I LOVE murals….

Mural Magic: 9 Artists Making Communities Stronger and Brighter, One Wall at a Time

Find a mural(s) in your town and take some fun selfies. Make it a fun date night, family, or friend adventure. Murals bring creativity and color into your life. They spark brilliance.

……………….

God gave you the opportunity to show up and experience this life. 

He believes in you and all your possibilities.

Beautiful 

-Elizabeth Gilbert podcast

Not quoted—essence of what she said for a good life…

……………….

A mother

Is the heart of LOVE for a family. How does she do her best work if she is tapped, drained and exhausted of the living life source she is and the gift that she is to give to her family. She needs to refills, to nourish, to seek internal guidance, wisdom, insight for the love of her family.

She does not serve anyone well if she is exhausted from the nonstop need to be driven by the world and all it steals from the spirit of a mother. 

Mothers are a guiding light to the children and a steward of balance to their partner. When a woman is stripped down of time to pray for guidance, meditation, self-care, timing…when she is run ragged by the expectation of the world—our society will suffer from the imbalance of a woman teetering to gain the necessities to best serve her greatest loves…the family that she wholeheartedly yearns to give her best. (wrote this summing up what Marianne Williamson said in an interview—it was very powerful to me)

………………

Marianne Williams

Oprah show

If the world changes in this way or that way…then I will be at peace

If the money comes, the job comes…

When we find peace then those things have an easier time happening. 

Peace of mind is not circumstance dependent. 

Peace of mind is an internal matter. 

We have faith in the negativity and frustration of this world. What we need is to draw our belief in the negativity and open the door to the belief that God has the power to break through any limitation, negativity and be open to infinite possibilities. 

No one grows in this world from a reality of love. We from a young age are bombarded by stimuli, thinking, patterns…everything but love. We grow being told you need to do a certain thing to be worthy, people are not their love, but their mistakes, their guilt…not enough resources…not enough love…but through spiritual practices…different paths…we unlearn those beliefs and begin to find love again

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LOVES giving

Lotto winner gives SOO much away https://nicenews.com/acts-of-kindness/lottery-winner-donated-more-than-half-of-her-fortune/

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Tiny notes from the Netflix movie,

A Tourists Guide to Love

A tourist wants to escape life.

A traveler wants to experience it. 

What’s so bad about wanting to occasionally escape your life?

You don’t know how long life is going to be, so why waste it on an escape.

Spend it on experience instead. 

Be open to new experiences..stinky fruit (jack fruit)tasted SOO good. 

Vietnamese traffic key—-always move forward…never back.

I know my limitations! I would have never done that (crossed the road w traffic)

So, don’t limit yourself!

Savoring the moment—closes his eyes. Takes a breath as he covers his heart and savors. 

New clothes for the new year—brings luck and prosperity. 

Wishing ritual with box candle on floating pond. 

I want experiences!! I want off the beaten path!

Fun to see food cooked and places in large leaf bowls. 

Spirits are always listening. Send a message. Pay your respects. 

Rituals from other countries. SOO cool. 

Inscence sticks prayed and stuck into the ground. Also burnt offerings to ask for the blessings from those on the other side. 

………………

Repeat after me

When you get caught focusing on your weaknesses—-say

“I am a LEADER”

“I am ENTHUSIASM”

“I am the POTENTIAL OF INCREDIBLE THINGS”

CREATE a personal mission statement that includes ways to apply your strengths & say or journal the statement every morning as you get ready. 

………………

“Life is a mountain. Your goal is to find your path, not to reach the top.” -Maxime Lagace

Life’s journey is a rich one full of many opportunities and paths that lead to different destinations. Our goal should be to find the path that fits our desires, our direction, our internal compass.When we get to the point where we can hear guidance within, listen deeply to our greater needs, our life will thrive in the rich paths that take us to higher places and ultimately…home. -H

………………

That is all I have for now. Life is in session…take good notes!!

Peace, LOve and Light to you. Shine with Brilliance. xoxo -H

Lessons learned from the movie: Gran Turismo

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Wow! I am not a gamer. I have barely played Mario Cart a dozen times with my daughter, so to imagine the insane true story of Gran Turismo was quite the movie ride. I would highly recommend this movie to anyone who can appreciate a great, true story.

I was literally cheering in the theater and clapping with awe and approval throughout. It was such an inspiring, unbelievable story. I wanted to take some good lessons away from the overall theme.

I will TRY very hard not to spoil or ruin the story for you, but I wanted to share a few key ideas.

My favorite line: One of the last scenes in the movie, Jann has to put himself back into the game mindset & reminds his coach that he needs to follow his own line. I love that! Each and everyone of us has uniqueness and skills that are our very own; unlike anyone else. We must remember that in all we do. There is not another person like us. We have to show up and live the life we are meant to follow. Follow your own line!! No one else’s!

Some other key points and take aways:

“Sometimes when I’m driving I can be going so fast and everything else is moving so slow. And so the rest of the world just falls away and there is just you and the car and that’s it. It’s kind of magic.” [Jann to Audrey] I think this line is almost like a relaxing meditation, a place you can go that is free from the noise of the world. Sometimes when you are walking in nature, finding a stillness watching water or waves, planting flowers, etc. There is a inner place that seems to slow, to unwind and almost just lets go. That is a beautiful space.

“Good news no one thinks we can do this.” [Jack to Jann]. This story was definitely one for the underdogs. Who doesn’t cheer for those who no one believes in. The story was peppered with disbelief and struggle and fight.

Jann was talking to his father, “You remember this day? You took this with me when I was five. All I wanted to do since then is be a racer. I’m doing it. Whether you believe in me or not.” This was powerful because I think there are moments in everyone’s life when we are told limiting tales that either build or break us at certain moments in our lives. It was wonderful to see someone with such a spirit of conviction and determination. We all need examples of that. We all need people who push beyond the barriers and show the world that they were made for greater distances. We all have that within us. Some are just better at following their own heart and believing in their dreams. May we all FEEL the personal greatness we were born with. It is there!

Orlando Bloom stars in Columbia Pictures GRAN TURISMO. Photo by: Gordon Timpen

“Nobody’s gonna welcome you into this world. The other drivers, your pit crew, nobody wants you here.” [Jack to Jann]. I think we have all had moments where we felt like an outsider, someone didn’t want to work with us, we didn’t belong, etc. Life is full of those moments. Those are the situations that help refine and define us. Think about a time when you felt like this. What did you learn about yourself? This was a defining part in the movie for Jann. He had to push forward despite knowing most of the racing community did not want him.

“If you miss a line in the game you reset.  If you miss it on the track you could die.” This whole story pushed the stakes on every level. We all get opportunities, challenges, life shifts, doors that open, people who come into our lives to push us to a different path…life is a different level for every single person. Some deal with heartbreaking tragedy, where another struggles to step out of depression. Someone may lose a child or someone else may lose a job. Every situation is different for one another on some level. It is how we face the challenge. It is how we live through the pain. It is how we learn through the struggle that helps us reset and move beyond on some level.

“I know you’re scared. I’ve been scared. But whether you like it or not, you are in this race.” [Jack to Jann]. We have all been scared in life. Those are those moments that you learn and grow from. It doesn’t make life easier, it just allows you to know and understand how strong you can become. Jann was a great example of facing the fear and moving forward despite it.

Jack Salter encouraged Jann by telling him,”You look for continual improvement… You’ve got instincts.  That can’t be taught.” If we are always looking for continual improvement, then life will support us in any endeavor, dream and direction. It is when we become stagnate and disillusioned that life gets heavier and the dreams seem farther away. We must follow those strengths that we have and strive to get a little better each day. Learning is continual growth and improvement.

It was a very powerful movie. There will always be critics. There will always be comments–good or bad, but when you have a story that has a hero you can get behind—you can always learn something. Highly recommend. Go see it!!

Have an incredible day!! Go Live it! -H

Desiderata

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‘Desiderata’

Something that is needed or wanted.

I LOVE the power of words and the deep meaning they can relay when they are strung together in a beautiful sentiment. When we read words written by others, inspired from places of silence, thought up or provoked from a higher muse, we can find glimpses, lines, and deeper meanings for each and every one of us. Writers, artists, musicians, I believe bring us gifts through their individual inspiration. They help unlock or open places within us that lead to deeper things we may need or desire.

I came across a lovely poem, Desiderata by Max Ehrmann and had to share.

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

by Max Ehrmann ©1927

After you read this poem–find a Phrontistery [a place for thinking] and ask yourself, ‘What stands out to you?’ What pieces or lines speak to your ‘desires’ or desiderata?

I believe there will be lines that will stand out to you and allow you to reflect on something needed or necessary to ponder on a grander scale. I had my husband read this and share with me what stood out. He spoke of the work line first because, obviously work is often at the top of his mind. Then, he spoke of the line: listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. Because he was visiting with his elderly mother who would talk on and on and on and this line helped him to be patient and listen with more of an understanding of where she is at in her life. She just wants to share and needs her son there to listen and care.

For me, the lines that stuck out were: Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. Because, to me, I am always humbled and in awe of the simple thought that we are so divine in our existence and that God is aware of how our lives should unfold. That is a beautiful sentiment to me.

May you sit with this poem…these words and find something that speaks to you.

-Peace, Love and Light to you. xoxo

To: a gift of INTENTION

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The intention behind our giving and receiving is the most important thing. When the act of giving is joyful, when it is unconditional and from the heart, then the energy behind the giving increases many times over. But if we give grudgingly, there is no energy behind that giving. If we feel we have lost something through the act of giving, then the gift is not truly given and will not cause increase. -Deepak Chopra

I just turned 50 yesterday and it was a mix of emotions. I just lost my brother a couple months ago, so a song came on that made me think how short life is, for some even shorter and I broke down in tears. But, probably the hardest part of my birthday, my one and only child did not do one thing for me. I strive to live with such intention, so to hear her talk about not having time to write a card, my heart ached. For whatever reason, cards, words, the emotional ties that bind me to my people mean more than any gift I could ever receive. Especially the words and sentiments from those closest to me. Part of the day, I watched her jump on instagram, secretly hoping she was going to make a post about her love, care and appreciation she felt for her mom. Partially, because she had just done one for her Dad for Father’s Day. I kept waiting to get a loving text, a little note…something that said she cares. We have been struggling in our relationship, so I assumed she would especially take the time to do or say something because of how hard its been between us. The day ended with me lying in bed alone, crying at the degree in which she had no care for me on my one and only birthday. It broke my heart on some level.

On a BRIGHTER side….The 2 greatest gifts from the day: INTENTION. My sweet husband had orchestrated pale blue and white balloons to go along with a tiny typed quote that was held by a piece of drift wood. The whole idea: the sky and my love for it. The quote, “An awake heart is like a sky that pours light.” -Hafiz. He also left a vase of flowers & a “book about us” he had filled in. It was such a beautiful sentiment that my husband took the time to plan and create such an intentional gift. Thank you, love. xoxo

The other gift: A woman who inspires me daily. There is a woman in my neighborhood that we have been getting to know and she is a shining example of intentional giving. She has got to be in her late 70’s or 80’s. Not even sure, but she has the best attitude and always spreads love and light in all she does. Her and her sweet husband [they go by Patty Peace & Jack Joy] that is battling cancer are always running little gifts, notes, packages and dropping them off to various people in the neighborhood.

Every time I see a grocery bag left on the porch, I smile, “Patty!!” sings from my lips and I am excited to open the precious, intentional gift. The morning of my birthday I gently pulled out a cardboard shirt box that had flower stickers covering the top with tiny quotes that were handwritten. My heart smiled at the very sight of such care, time and intention that was put in. Curly ribbon is always a bright staple of this cute lady. I opened the box to find her usual kindness—little pieces of herself to share. A bandana with a tag & handwritten note that described the many uses of such an accessory. There were also a couple scarfs, some hair ties with plastic baubles—I instantly gave one to my daughter & we wore them as birthday bracelets. She always includes a tiny, pocket Kleenex and little notes of love, all neatly wrapped with individual pieces of colorful tissue paper. Everything done with such care.

It reminds me to always seek to be as intentional and mindful as Patty. To live in such a way that you shower others with gifts of intention and care. To slow down and take the time to write notes, to include quotes and sincere sentiments.

The next morning my husband and I were on a walk with our two dogs & who did we run into? Beautiful Patty. She lit up when she saw me wearing her gifted bandana. I had it wrapped and tied around my neck. She beamed and said, “Oh, you are wearing it! I love how you tied it. It is wonderful.” The tiny gesture, the little love exchanged was a gift to all of us.

We are gifts to one another’s lives. Life is in session and we must show up and present our best life with genuine intention. Thank you, Patty & Jack

PS my husband had a sweet talk with our daughter the next day & she broke down in tears. She knew she needed to be better & felt so bad that I had been so hurt. She secretly wrote me a VERY LOVING and HEARTFELT card & left it on my pillow the next night. It was a sweet surprise. It was also very needed. 😉 and appreciated. We must always remember to never give up on one another either.

xoxo Peace, Love and Light. THANKS for the INTENTIONAL LOVE. -H

We ALL need CONNECTION

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I LOVE the origin of words…CONNECTION

Where did the word connection come from? Etymology.[the study of the origin of words] From Middle English conneccioun, connexioun, conneccyon, conneccion, from Latin connexionem (nominative connexio (“a conclusion, binding together”)), from connectō, an alternative spelling of cōnectō (“I bind together”), from compound of co- (“together”) and nectō (“I bind”).

So, to bind together is a beautiful way to describe our need for connection. Like a coming together to bind or bond. Last night my husband and I were whale watching from a bench along the Oregon coast when a young man stood near us looking out into the vast horizon. We started to talk to him and shared with him that there were a number of whales to see. He perked right up. We knew he was not local and began to ask questions and inquire where he was from. He chimed in & told us he was from Germany. He began to tell us about his bike excursion down the coast & that he had been traveling for months through Canada, and just left Washington and was headed to California. Then a whale blew & he began to see the number of whales, “That is a lot of whales,” He smiled. We smiled and kept asking him questions. We then invited him to come stay for a meal, shower and a good night sleep in a bed. He thought for a moment and then said, “Yes. I accept your invitation.” We directed him to some cliffs beyond the bench and told him we would throw his bike in our truck and head out shortly.

It was such a fun evening getting to connect with a complete stranger from a foreign land. We had him share his highlights of dog-mushing in Canada, learned about his siblings and family in Germany, talked about the Ukrainian war and its impact in Europe, back and forth we shared over Mexican food by our outdoor fire pit. We all walked the beach together, watched the sun set and then relaxed for the evening with more questions and the movie, “The Life of Walter Mitty.” Our new friend, Marios took it all in and was so gracious in all he did. He snacked, smiled and indulged us when we told him he had to try one of our favorite, relaxing, family rituals…footie socks! He looked at us very strange and said, “What are footie socks?” His puzzled face was priceless. We showed him how to apply the cheap, moisturizing foot socks & the whole family had them on while we watched the movie. He was amazed and took silly photos with our dogs and his socks. “Crazy Americans!” We all laughed.

It was a great time connecting with another human living a different experience. We are all like that. Different circumstances, thoughts, governments, ideas, beliefs, desires, culture, family…but in situations like this, we are all just people…getting to know one another, connecting, sharing, learning and caring.

Connection gives you new perspectives, it helps you see the world from various views, and allows you to just LOVE. We are just people. We are all in this together. We genuinely enjoyed hearing him share stories about different people he has met along the way. He shared how he thought the trip would be harder and lonelier, but for him, he has felt more connected. He has met many people his age along the way, made new friends in various places and shared that when he started the trip he was much more introverted and shared that the journey has helped him so much.

It was wonderful. This morning I wrote him a small note to pass along our info. and stay connected. In the note, I attached the quote from the movie, Walter Mitty that was the Life Magazine Motto…

This movie, this quote, this connection with our new friend help solidify how important and life affirming connection truly is. We need to “find each other, and to feel.” There is real purpose and meaning when we get to notice and value another person and their journey. It is a beautiful gift.

Reach out and connect with a stranger, begin a conversation, open a door and smile, share in the tiny connections that help us find, feel and connect.

Thank you, Marios for being authentically you, being open and willing to be part of our family for a day and to share in your journey. What a gift. We are all gifts to one another if we open our hearts and seek the connections.

Be safe, friend.

Peace, Love and Light. -H