LOVE should be for every season and every reason in what we say and do. Right?
At least that is something to strive for on a more regular basis.
So….I cannot emphasize this enough. I just started doing conversations and love letters to myself after hearing Tim Ferris and Elizabeth Gilbert talking about her morning ritual.
Take some time and simply write a love letter to yourself. In reality, you are starting a conversation with God…the Universe…the source of all things…whatever makes your heart sing. You are trying to understand and see what would be said to YOU. This has been a truly inspiring exercise for me and I would highly suggest it. Take the time, begin the practice. It doesn’t have to be every day. I usually write when I FEEL like I am in a better head space to listen and tune in.
I begin the love letter to myself with various things…Oh darling, My love, Love, Beautiful…[this in and of itself is interesting to see what you hear and feel on even a basic level…what do you hear yourself being called?] Then, I just sit with myself for a few minutes and type any thoughts that come to me…questions, advice, conversation…anything. I often feel like its a two-sided conversation and so I type out both sides. It is humbling and interesting to hear words come up that I never use or ideas and thoughts that don’t seem like me. It definitely helps me connect even deeper. I close my eyes, listen and type whatever comes up.
It has been a beautiful gift to myself. It makes me feel even more deeply connected to the greater life we all live. There is such a vast beyond, a timeless space that awaits a conversation with us. Don’t miss it. Don’t take it for granted or question every little thing to look beyond the possibilities of such treasured conversations and love. We all need it. WE NEED AND CRAVE THE GREATER LOVE.
So, with the holiday season upon us, I would gift you this…give this beautiful gift to YOURSELF. Gift it to your families, friends and loved ones. Open the door of deeper conversations and love to those YOU LOVE.
We ALL NEED MORE LOVE.
Simply try it. BUT, I would suggest in all fairness of any process….you TRY it more than one time. You need to allow and believe in something greater than yourself and the greater LOVE you deserve.
Learn the rules like a pro, soyou can break them like an artist. -Pablo Picasso
There is so much excitement, fear, information, misinformation, disconnect…about AI and it is and will be an ongoing conversation for sometime.
I just read a story in Rick Rubin’s book, The Creative Act about an ancient Chinese boardgame, GO. Here is the story from his book: Some three thousand years ago in China, the strategic board game Go was developed. Some believe warlords and generals based it on the stones they’d place on maps to determine their battle plans. Besides being the oldest continually played board game in human history, it’s also one of the most complex.
In modern times, beating this game became known in the artificial intelligence community as the holy grail. Since the number of possible configurations on the board is larger than the number of atoms in the universe, it was believed computers didn’t have the processing power needed to beat a skilled human player.
Rising to the challenge, scientists built an artificial intelligence program called AlphaGo. The program learned to play by teaching itself, studying more than 100,000 past games. It then played against itself over and over until it was ready to challenge the reigning grandmaster of the game.
In move 37 of the second match, the machine was faced with a decision that would determine the way the rest of the game would be played. There were two apparent choices to be made. Choice A was the kind of move that would signal the computer was playing a game of offense. Choice B would signal it was playing a defensive game.
Instead, the computer decided to make a third move, a move no one steeped in the game had ever made in thousands of years of play. “Not a single human player would choose move 37,” one commentator said. Most thought it was a mistake or simply a bad move.
The grandmaster playing against the machine was so taken aback, he stood up and walked out of the room. He eventually returned, not with his usual confident composure but visibly shaken and frustrated by the experience. In the end, AlphaGo won the game. And that never-been-seen- before move, experts said, was the one that turned the course of the game in favor of the AI.
In the end, the computer won four out of five matches, and the grandmaster permanently retired from competition.
Upon first hearing this story, I found myself in tears, and confused by this sudden swell of emotion. After further reflection, I realized that the story spoke to the power of purity in the creative act.
What was it that allowed a machine to devise a move no one steeped in the game had ever made in thousands of years of play?
It wasn’t necessarily its intelligence. It was the fact that the machine learned the game from scratch, with no coach, no human intervention, no lessons based on an expert’s past experience. The AI followed the fixed rules, not the millennia of accepted cultural norms attached to them. It didn’t take into account the three-thousand-year-old traditions and conventions of Go. It didn’t accept the narrative of how to properly play this game. It wasn’t held back by limiting beliefs.
And so this wasn’t just a landmark event in AI development. It was the first time Go had been played with the full spectrum of possibilities available. With a clean slate, AlphaGo was able to innovate, devise something completely new, and transform the game forever. If it had been taught to play by humans, it most likely wouldn’t have won the tournament.
__________
I look at this story with a perspective of seeking to find places within ourselves where creation, curiosity, dreams, divine patterns, timing, designs seek to play with us on an individual basis. Have we LEARNED too many human patterns? Have we let our ego run wild and have forgotten the deeper connections and creations within us? Is there a way for us to pull back the habits and conditioning of expectation, perfection, drive and business to begin to slow, seek, dive deeper, listen and try to follow those unexpected surprises and desires that are waiting for our attention.
I don’t know. We are definitely conditioned creatures and society continues to prey on us with trying to sell us on fitting in or creating like everyone else. That is where our attention needs to be. We cannot truly bring anything authentic into the world if we are just creating by following and copying everyone else.
We have every ability to also make unexpected moves or take steps that lead to new learning, destinations, creations, patterns and ideas…we just have to work on believing in our ability and the individual power we have in our own right.
I just had a conversation with my daughter about Instagram and how certain songs create social connections, so there are soo many people on Instagram playing the SAME music, creating the same layouts…to hope to catch other people’s trends and follows. Does that make sense?? Maybe in an automated world. BUT, we are creators, so what is happening to the desire to seek new, create new, delight the senses and awaken another part of the world with NEW content, individual content, creativity that is soulful and is sought out in wonder, awe, creation…
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE seeing people tapping in to nature shots, adding music that touches on deeper levels, catching a glimpse of awe and wonder in a sunrise or sunset. There is so much beauty being shared. I sincerely do love and appreciate so much of it. I just think there can continue to be even more depth when we are tuning in to a higher frequency of divine creativity.
Looking at AI—there is a lot of incredible technology that is just barely tapping the surface. After watching the Oprah special with many BIG players in the AI space, I was honestly more concerned about what bad things will be used and created than anything.
For me, AI can write and construct beautiful sentences, share stories that have detail, make videos that have incredible cinematic visuals, make unexpected moves but what it does not have….HEART. The authentic heart of everything creative that is within every single individual. We are ALL creators, whether you believe it or not. Divine creation and its ability is within us. AI will not ever be able to duplicate that depth of creation.
That is all I am going to say.
May you continue to write from your heart, share your stories, create your art…because no matter what systems can and will be built—the machines will not have YOUR uniqueness or the divine creations YOU will bring to the world.
“I would rather spend one lifetime with you, than face all the ages of this world alone.” —J.R.R. Tolkien
I have been all alone from my little tribe and my heart FEELS it. The above line sings deeply to where I am in my current life situation.
“I had something to fight for, and I was fighting for the love of my life. I couldn’t give up or give in—not now. Not after all I’d been through—all we’d been through.” ― Shanora Williams, “100 Proof”
My sweet husband has up and moved to Montana to financially support our family and our hearts have desperately missed one another. It is funny how the heart grows fonder and you wish and you long for the love you miss. He is my best friend and we often find ourselves talking about wishing we were doing this or that together. We don’t have that co-dependent kind of love, we just sincerely enjoy our time and friendship together, so our hearts definitely long to be connected.
“When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, no one can ever tear them apart.”
“Falling in love is easy, but staying in love is very special.”
My daughter fell quickly in love with a French exchange student who invited her to France for four weeks this summer and that is where she is. She has been with him 24/7 and having the time of her life. They seem to be falling in love more and more every day. That says something for my daughter—she usually is tired of anyone after 3-5 days. I genuinely wondered how it would be and if she would be headed home early. This morning she called me in tears, “I just saw his beautiful, new apartment he is going to be living in. It is going to be his new life and I will not be in it. It makes me so sad.” I felt the deep love and connection she was feeling and I broke down in tears too. Love does that. You want those you love to be happy. That is what she followed up her tears with, “I want him to be happy and I am so happy he has a wonderful place to live, its just hard knowing I won’t be here to drop by or live this life with him.” “Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” —Robert A. Heinlein
“I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.” —Roy Croft
“A successful relationship requires falling in love multiple times, but always with the same person.”
LOVE does that to people—-it connects you so deeply that when your hearts are apart—in some sense they do break. They break open to a different type of love—a love that realizes how deeply you are connected to one another. Its as if you are able to see the current love you have from a new angle and see that it is immeasurable. Love keeps growing and changing and longing to be felt more and more. “My love for you has no depth, its boundaries are ever-expanding.” —Christina White
I am trying to look at this time as a gift for my life, to ensure that I never take the love we have for granted. It has made me step back and notice the complacency we were tripping into on occasion. We took it for granted that we could walk the beach every day together and now its only a week out of the month. It is true—you don’t truly appreciate what you have until its gone. Don’t waste LOVE.
“She knew she loved him when ‘home’ went from being a place to being a person.” —E. Leventhal
I was talking to my brother on the phone and expressing to him how quickly time goes by and how his kids will be grown before he knows it. I shared how you can understand it on an even deeper level by thinking about how many days he sees his kids per week and calculating that until they are on their own. It gives hard numbers that are hard to minimize. My brother then joked, “So you get to see Jonny 12 more times this year.” My heart sank at the thought. It did make me ponder the reality and how sad that truly is. What if I only get to spend lets say 11 days a month for six months–that is only 66 days. That is incredibly sad. We only have this one lifetime together. How do we NEED to spend it!? We NEED to be together! You don’t genuinely appreciate the time you have together until something like having to move to Montana makes you truly ponder. It has made me genuinely see that HE is my home. I think many people just get use to their regular routines and the love falls flat or becomes part of the scenery and is not center stage in their life. It gets lost in the weeds of carpool, work, routine, kids clubs, obligations, etc. Love needs to be noticed, to feel seen and appreciated to continue to grow. It is like anything–it needs to be watered and sprinkled with the necessities and nourishment to thrive….
I just laughed in my head at the thought that just popped in—The funny movie with Kate Hudson in “How to Lose a guy in 10 days” where she gives him a “Love fern.” It is just like that!! It needs to be loved, watered, taken care of, put in some sunlight and talked to with great care. That is how love is. I think we just get by with love and don’t take the necessary steps to help it flourish.
DONT WASTE YOUR LIFE WITH NOT LOVING THE WAY LOVE NEEDS…DEEPLY
“The regret of my life is that I have not said ‘I love you’ often enough.” —Yoko Ono
Remind yourself of the gift love is. Not everyone gets a glimpse or a chance to share in love, so if you are so lucky—take a chance, play full out, fight hard for love and never give up. Keep working at it and give so much that you become exhausted in LOVE. No regrets.
“Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness.” —Bertrand Russell DONT be cautious in LOVE. Time zips by and will leave you standing there wondering where life went and where the beautiful love that your heart longed for exists. Take every risk in love, dance at every occasion, pray to the heavens for doors to open and seize the opportunities before they are stolen from you and you miss it! DONT WASTE LOVE. Your happiness depends on the love you can learn from and the wisdoms that it will freely give your life. It is a precious treasure to not take for granted. Seek to find it and never use caution—only deliberate passion and discovery when it comes to finding LOVE. It may be hiding, but you do all you can to find it.
My very FAVORITE thought on LOVE…When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too. -Paulo Coelho LOVE changes EVERYTHING for the better. BELIEVE that. LIVE that. JUST LOVE.
My husband and I will find a way. Our LOVE is deep but it is still hard to be apart. We have to have the faith that LOVE WILL FIND A WAY and EVERYTHING WILL WORK OUT…FOR LOVE. it will. LOVE CHANGES EVERYTHING FOR THE BETTER…
But, for all of you who have LOVE lying next to you or can share a kiss anytime or give a simple hug or can go on a walk together today…GO DO IT. DONT WASTE LOVE. I cannot tell you how many times I just want to hug my husband or hold his hand…DONT WASTE the LOVE you have in front of you.
“You can’t just give up on someone because the situation’s not ideal. Great relationships aren’t great because they have no problems. They’re great because both people care enough about the other person to find a way to make it work.”
“If you want a relationship that looks and feels like the most amazing thing on earth, you need to treat it like it is the most amazing thing on earth.” -your tango
“A ‘perfect marriage’ is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.”
“True love is rare, and it’s the only thing that gives life real meaning.” —Nicholas Sparks
“True love stories never have endings.” —Richard Bach
So, there you go. DONT WASTE ANOTHER MINUTE ON THE LOVE YOU HAVE. CHERISH IT. DISCOVER IT. NOURISH IT. FIGHT FOR IT. and above all else…JUST LOVE DEEPLY with your WHOLE HEART. You have this ONE LIFETIME. BE WITH THOSE YOU LOVE. CHOOSE LOVE. NO REGRETS.
“Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise so I am changing myself.” -Rumi
“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Gandhi
This is the tricky thing about life, getting to that point where you feel as though you are actually grasping the lessons that life is offering. ‘OFFERING’— like a silver platter that holds intimate, personal notes and details of learning for your best life.
Oh, how I wish that I could have a magic, silver platter that would offer a new life WISDOM, daily. I really had to sit and think about this—-would I rather have wisdom or a lesson? To keep things in perspective we are given lessons daily, so the real gifts would be a daily wisdom, right?
“Knowledge comes from learning. Wisdom comes from LIVING.” -Anthony Douglas Williams
I am going to deep dive into the internet, ask friends and family and share what I can uncover from a deeper, wiser place. haha
I do believe that to become wiser we must EXPERIENCE life. I am a big believer in the deeper, more meaningful stuff that gives life the real richness. Experiences create that. -H
“A mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes
“”Every person that comes into our life comes for a reason; some come to learn and others come to teach.” -Antoine de Saint-Exupery Are you listening? Learning? Loving? I was at the grocery store this morning and I noticed a nice looking, well-groomed man who was walking around the store parking lot with a small broom and dust pan. I was getting into my car when he was within a small distance. I looked at him, smiled and said, “I bet sweeping is kind of like a nice meditation.” He smiled, “I am grateful I get to do this. I have been working for the man who owns this property for 13 years. We have so much to be grateful for. Gratitude is a wonderful thing. The world needs more of it.” I replied, “Absolutely. He is lucky to have someone like you who cares and takes pride in what he does. Have a beautiful day.” He warmly smiled and said, “you as well.” It was a short but sweet interaction that made me stop and reflect—if this man can find such gratitude in a simple sweeping job, what do I possibly have to complain about?—I am reminded of a speech by MLK that said, “If it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures, sweep streets like Beethoven composed music, sweep streets like Leontyne Price sings before the Metropolitan Opera. Sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will have to pause and say: Here lived a great street sweeper who swept his job well.” I LOVE that! In whatever you find yourself doing, at whatever crossroad, whatever age, whatever destination—find purpose and give of your best in all you do. There is great wisdom in that!! -H
“If I asked you to write a list of all the things you love, how long will it take for you to write your name?”
“Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life.” – Omar Khayyam
“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of god, which is why we call it the present.” – Bil Keane
“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ― Gautama Buddha
“The meaning of life is to give life meaning.”
KARMA
NAMASTE
“Know thyself” -Socrates
“Just do it” -Nike
Make your life mean something to YOUrself.
“Above all, don’t lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love.” -Fyodor Dostoevsky (The Brothers Karamazov)
I like this…Why do we tell and insist that people, “Have a great day!” Maybe we just need to begin with the small things and be grateful, instead of setting ourselves up for a necessary expectation of an ENTIRE day being great!! haha. Maybe strive for a peaceful morning or what about a nice afternoon and then …take your day, your job, your life moments and appreciate the small wins of a healthy breakfast that you had time to enJOY. Maybe you buy yourself flowers just because. Maybe say thank you that you had a calm, loving conversation with your daughter or that you were able to take the time to see the sun rise or set. Take the time to notice all the little things that end up creating a truly great day.
What’s one piece of wisdom or advice that has stuck with you throughout your life–— When I was a boy 7 or 8 years old, and I’m 76 now, my grandfather, “the most important man in my life at that time and beyond,” told me that there was a treasure chest up in the attic, and that whatever was in it, I could have! So I went running upstairs to the attic and found a box, right where he said the treasure chest would be! So I opened it, and much to my surprise there was nothing in it! So I went back downstairs and told my Granddad, “I found the treasure chest but there wasn’t anything in it!!! It was empty!!!” He said “I know son. That treasure chest is just like life, if you don’t put anything into it, you won’t be getting anything out of it.” At the time, my little boy brain couldn’t process the data! So my Grandad got us some graham crackers and milk, and we ate and drank milk and had a really good time! And here at 76 years old, I can still hear my Granddad’s voice! “That treasure chest is just like life, if you don’t put anything into it, you won’t be getting anything out of it.” That’s as far back as I can go with regard to shared wisdom that stayed with me throughout my life. Great question! And thanks for that trip down memory lane.
And I have a tip for anyone reading this that is fortunate enough to be a Grandparent… You are some of the most precious people on the Planet Earth, please pour into those grandchildren, they love and need you, and they will NEVER forget you. -Harold Lindsey [taken from Quora]
Steve Jobs last words according to close family was “oh, Wow. Oh, Wow. Oh, Wow.”
Some of the last WISDOMS of Steve Jobs, billionaire, dead at 56:
“I have reached the pinnacle of success in business.” In other people’s eyes my life is a success. However, aside from work, I’ve had little joy. At the end of the day, wealth is just a fact I’ve gotten used to. Right now, lying on my hospital bed, reminiscing all my life, I realize that all the recognition and wealth I took so much pride in, has faded and become meaningless in the face of imminent death. You can hire someone to drive your car or make money for you, but you can’t hire someone to stand sick and die for you. Material things lost can be found again. But there is one thing that can never be found when it is lost: Life. Whatever stage of life we are currently at, in time we will face the day the curtain closes. Love your family, spouse, children and friends… Treat them right . Cherish them. As we get older, and wiser, we slowly realize that wearing a $300 or $30 watch both give the same time Whether we have a $300 or $30 wallet or purse, the amount inside is the same. Whether we drive a $150,000 car or a $30,000 car, the road and the distance are the same, and we reach the same destination. Whether we drink a $1000 or $10 bottle of wine, the hangover is the same. Whether the house in which we live is 100 or 1000 square meters, loneliness is the same. You will realize that your true inner happiness does not come from material things of this world. Whether you travel first class or economy class, if the plane crashes, you go down with it… Therefore, I hope you realize, when you have friends, brothers and sisters, with whom you discuss, laugh, talk, sing, talk about north-south-east or heaven and earth,… this is the real happiness!!
An indisputable fact of life: Don’t raise your children to be rich. Educate them to be happy. When they grow up, they will know the value of things and not the price. “
The six best doctors in the world are sunlight, rest, exercise, diet, self-confidence, and friends. Maintain them in all stages and enjoy a healthy life.
“The only constant in life is change.” This acknowledges the fact that change is inevitable and encourages us to embrace it rather than resist it. It reminds us to be adaptable and flexible in the face of challenges and uncertainty. -Julie Moraa (Quora)
“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.” – Albert Einstein
Tibetan Value: “The secret to living well and longer is: eat half, walk double, laugh triple and love without measure.” – Tibetan Proverb.
“Life is what you make it.”
“The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Let us move forward with strong and active faith.” -FDR
“Your mind is like the sky – Dark clouds, storms, sunshine…It all comes and goes. But the sky, it’s always there. Just watch. Just observe. It will pass.”
“Don’t fear death or dying. Fear never having truly lived.”
“Don’t let anyone dull your sparkle.”
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, an honest compliment or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”
“Happiness doesn’t have to be chased…it merely has to be chosen.”— Mandy Hale
“You are either growing or dying.”
Yesterday I had an epiphany. I was trying to figure out how to make sense of something I just couldn’t understand. Here is what I asked a man. “Will you teach me, or show me the point?” The man’s response, “I could present all the help required and with a little practice, you’ll learn it word for word.” “If you memorize it, you’ll know it.” “If you experience it, you’ll see the bigger picture and the wisdom will be yours forever.” -Leon, quota
“The one who whines, never shines.”
Do something, learn something, try something to become a little better each day.
Read. Read. Read. Don’t let socials, television, tech steal so much of your one, brilliant, quick life.
“The important things in life, aren’t ‘THINGS”
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with Compassion , gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” – Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
“If you judge people, you have no time to LOVE them.”
Hope this list of WISDOMS finds you well and you can take note of some of the ideas that may inspire, change, guide you to further wisdom for your life. So many great guiding ideas.
Make each moment YOURS…seek and find the WISDOMS you need for an even better life.
” You are not less divine. Divine is not somewhere outside of you. When you see Divinity everywhere, you see it in you as well. You are part of the Divine.” -Sri
All of these images I have taken to help me remember the wonder, beauty, divine essence that is in our every day. How can we not go outside and be in awe, when we see the incredible details that are put into every single moment of every day. I am always surprised when I see the dew drops so delicately balanced on a blade of grass or the lines of ferns that intertwine and roll open with such intricate patterning or the hues of sunsets, rainbows and rays of brilliant light. It is awe–inspiring. I am always falling in love a little more each day with the artistry that is life as a whole. There is growth, light, dark, perfect timing, seasons, struggle, balance, change…in all things. It is what makes everything beautiful.
Living on the coast has made me see a whole new perspective. When I first arrived on the Oregon Coast I watched the ocean and its energy seemed so angry, so intense, and it genuinely scared me. I walked the beach for awhile with certainty that the waves were trying to reach me to pull me into its depths. So as it would get closer I would quickly run away from it.
As I walk the beach every day, you begin to see the rhythm, the constant change, the ongoing struggle of the shore holding tight to the rising tides and currents. You see the sand literally moving and creating cliffs that were not there before. You walk over huge trees that were thrown and rolled onto the shore. You watch the sanderlings, I call them “sand darling” birds rush in and out of the waves as the water moves and glides in back and forth. It is almost like a dance with nature. There is a definite timing. The waves seem calm one day and the ocean looks like a lake, followed by the very next day, it may seem violent and turbulent, full of white foam and churning waves. It is a constant, ever-changing flow. I have learned to see and appreciate the beautiful changes and to not fear them. You begin to understand the timing and I now look at the waves as if they are trying to kiss me. I smile as the waves come closer.
There is a divine timing in all things. I sincerely believe that.
Last weekend we heard word that the Northern Lights were possibly going to be seen down throughout the states and my husband and I got very excited. We knew we needed to take the opportunity to seek out the experience. Our daughter was at a camp with 50 kids through her college about two hours south of us, but we told her about the possible light show.
It was just about midnight and we headed out toward our ocean spit because we knew the light pollution would not be as bad and we may get to see something.
Just then my daughter sent us a beautiful image of a purple/hot pink hued sky with a silhouette of trees and water. It was gorgeous. Her text, “Did you see that?! LOOK” I paused and could not believe the images, I responded, “What!! You got those??” I half believed the images that were so full of color and brilliance were being seen. Her response, “YESS!!”
By this time we were at the spit and our sky looked like there were wisps of white movement but not the incredible color that was coming through for our daughter. I quickly replied, “When did you get those??? Did we miss it??” She then called us and explained that you can’t actually SEE the lights of color unless you put your phone up to the sky and take a picture. Then the colors can be visible.
What!? I thought. What a crazy concept, but sure enough, we put our phones up to the sky and caught the color. It was amazing. It was so fun to point and shoot and see ocean waves with beautiful hues painting the sky. It was so magical. We just kept clicking pictures for an hour or so. The images changed with light and dark or varying in color. It was a once-in-a-lifetime sky and we were doing all we could to capture the magic of it. What a wonderful time!!
It makes you stop and ponder the divinity that is all around us. We may see the details in nature, but there is also a whole other extension, dimension, existence that plays all around us. There are miracles, magic, vibes, energy, starlight….there is so much divine power that whirls and encircles us that we sincerely don’t know very much about. I would definitely rather believe in the brilliance that may not be seen but is there helping run the greater light within my life.
May you begin to believe and see the glorious magic and divinity all around you.
Peace, Love and Light to you. xoxo -H
WANT MORE TO LEARN ABOUT… natural miracles or divine masterpieces to learn about…Monochromatic (one color rainbows)–I actually got to experience a beautiful white monochromatic rainbow that was created by the ocean mist here in Oregon. It was a massive arch rainbow of white over the ocean—very cool. Some other things I read about: Cave of Crystals in Mexicocontains some of the largest natural crystals ever found: translucent gypsum beams measuring up to 36 feet (11 meters) long and weighing up to 55 tons. Caño Cristales was found in 1969 by a group of cattle farmers. The river is commonly called the “River of Five Colors” or the “Liquid Rainbow,” and is noted for its striking colors. Sea Path in Korea: Every year, the water level in the sea located between Modo-ri of Euishinm-yeon and Heodong-ri of Gogun-myeon falls due to a neap tide, creating a long sea trail that is 40 meters wide. Jindo starts the sea trail festival when the sea has parted and the pathway reaches its greatest width. In Indonesia Kawah Ijen Volcano buns blue. Catatumbo lightningStorms. Essentially a 10 Hr lightning storm with tons of lightning flashes, like several per minute. The Doorway to hell in Turkmenistan. Giants Causeway in Ireland: The 40,000-odd basalt formations at the Giant’s Causeway in Northern Ireland Rainbow Mountains of China
Who knew… there were Arctic Snow Chimneys, Ice Volcano, Hawaii has a “green flash”, “Light Pillars” look incredible, Rainbow Eucalyptus trees, Green sand beaches (apparently there are only 4), Frost flowers, Sailing stones, Lenticular clouds look amazing, Hessdalen lights, apparently rains diamonds on Neptune and Uranus, , Ice circles—these remind me of the large air bubbles that occasionally show up in various places in the ocean & that reminds me of the beautiful water rings dolphins make, –(Thank you Reddit on some of these), Dolphins also have names for one another, Trees communicate with one another through their root system, Spider rain, Moonlight makes certain things grow faster. Some whale frequency sounds can travel over 10,000 miles…
I woke up to a “Dense FOG” warning this morning from my amazon Alexa weather alert. I got up anyway and went on my daily walk, but today took me back to a few memories of various places. I walked the golf course near my home and it took me back to the timing of almost three years ago when we first moved to the Oregon Coast. I noticed the chill in the air, the crispness, the quiet, the trees that almost seemed to peak out from the dense, cloud-like fog & if you looked up you would see blue sky, almost as if it were waiting for its turn to show up with the sunlight. Before moving to Oregon I had only really experienced dense fog on a few occasions & every time I would RUN to a nearby park to take pictures because I had never seen trees covered in a surrounding fog. Now, I see trees in fog quite a bit. It is funny how the normal things become the ordinary and you begin to miss the magic of the out-of-the-ordinary moments.
I realized this today—perspective makes us take notice. I did not take my camera out of my pocket once this morning because I take it for granted that there will be more foggy days. It was a sad reality because TODAY is all you are promised. You never know what lies ahead for tomorrow. What if I suddenly had to move and missed my opportunities to take foggy photos of trees in the mist? What if I suddenly was unable to walk and enjoy the beautiful golf course of fog? What if…can play out in a variety of scenarios. We only have today. We only have precious moments. There are no guarantees—that is real perspective!
When you have the same environment day in and day out—-it is easy to take things for granted. It is easy to say, “Maybe I will walk that path tomorrow”…”maybe I will take that photo tomorrow”…”Maybe I will walk the beach”…”Maybe I will have that conversation with my brother”…”Maybe I will take the time to go see my daughter”…
I have a wonderful neighbor who moved to the Oregon Coast from California to be closer to her daughter. Her daughter lives a couple hours away, but my neighbor rarely goes to visit her. The daughter is moving this weekend and invited us to come help her move. We happily said yes, despite her mom not going to take the time to go. What does that say to her daughter about priorities…her as a priority…PERSPECTIVE?
I guess it just makes my heart sad to see a missed opportunity. It could also be that I heard a story about a family who lives near my sister in Utah. The family was getting ready to go to a family baptism for one of their six children. Unbeknownst to the Dad he backed the car up & ran over their 2 year old child and she died. I cannot even begin to feel or understand the grief or process of ever trying to get over that tragedy. My heart cannot even fathom the reality of such a loss.
It does make me stop and gain a greater perspective on my own relationship with my beloved daughter. It makes me want to have any chance of a deep conversation or connection with her. It makes me want to drive three hours to just to see her beautiful smile and know she is feeling good. It makes me want to hug her with my heart and soul because I CAN. PERSPECTIVE.
There is another saying that is posted on my fridge, “If you look the right way you can see that the whole world is a garden.” I LOVE that. It is about life’s perspectives. It is all in how you look and perceive things.
This past week we took my daughter on a spring break trip down the Southern Coast of Oregon to the Redwoods. The weather was a downpour and then sunshine and then wind…it was a whirlwind of weather. We trudged through mud and over puddles through the big trees, we watched and admired the sideways rain that pounded the tin roof on the cafe we were having breakfast at, we hid out in a beach cave from the high winds…it was an adventure. One of my daughter’s favorite—camping in a yurt!! PERSPECTIVE. haha. The funny thing I found fun on our excursion was tipping my camera phone sideways to get a different picture—a different perspective. I had sideways beaches, gardens, my family…my daughter laughed at me and said, “vogue shots” We both laughed every time I would tip my camera.
EVERY PERSPECTIVE IS DIFFERENT.
When you begin to see anew, look differently at a situation, go in closer for a detail, capture every beautiful smile, listen to the deeper conversations, stand still and admire the little things in your every day—you begin to truly NOTICE the things that matter most.
Life is in session! EMBRACE it. CHASE the PERSPECTIVES that make you stop and take notice of the moments that make your life worth living. The moments that make the memories worthwhile. The photos that capture the silly, the mundane, the laughter, the experiences, the adventures, the rain, the sunshine, the details that ARE your life.
My younger brother unexpectedly died earlier this year and it was a tremendous shock to my entire family. When I think about him, I have a mix of emotions because so much of his life he felt lost and didn’t feel like he mattered. He often felt like no one would care if he was gone. He attempted suicide multiple times throughout his life and I was there for it all. I was a witness to his life—the pain, the heartache, the hope, the loss, the highs and lows. He was my little brother.
My last couple conversations with him were heartbreaking and we were both in tears talking about how his life did matter and that he would be missed. I felt like I was constantly trying to convince him of his importance and that he did matter.
It is funny how losing someone alters your life. I have had a terrible cold this past week and have found myself watching a home improvement show that has one of the show hosts who looks and has similarities to my brother. It makes me miss him even more. I watch this host and see my brother on certain angles, certain shots of his red beard, far off in the distance. I know it is not my brother but its funny to see someone with similarities and you just want a few minutes more with the one you cared about so deeply.
I LOVE you, Scotty. I miss you. xoxo
I wanted to do this post about the importance of MATTERING. It is a vital need. I think we have generations who are lacking in this necessity and I wanted to write something that may bring about some sort of awareness.
According to an article by the NYTimes, Dr. Flett, now a professor at York University and the author of “The Psychology of Mattering,” is one of the world’s foremost authorities on the subject. He and other experts agree that a sense of mattering is necessary for human flourishing, and while some factors are out of our control, there are steps, both big and small, that everyone can take to enhance it.
According to a Psychology Today article, However, while belonging does give a person a feeling that they are a “qualified member” of a group, it may not have the same positive effect of feeling that they matter to the group to which they belong. “Belonging” doesn’t necessarily mean as much as “mattering” to others (Hallam, 2023).
Think about how we use the word, belonging. My possessions are my belongings, but not all of my possessions matter to me. The scissors belong in the kitchen drawer, and my plates belong in the cabinet. I belong to the team, but do my contributions matter? You belong to your family, but do they show you that your presence matters?
Mattering is the product of two distinct processes at play: feeling valued by others and feeling that you add value to the group (Prilleltensky, 2014).
We feel that we matter when others express appreciation for what we bring and what we do. Belonging may mean that there’s a place for us or that we are “entitled” to a place, but when we matter, it means that others are grateful to have us show up in that place. Belonging is knowing that there is a place at the table for me, but mattering is knowing that the others at the table need me there to feel complete.
Others around you know they matter because of YOU and how you treat them.
I SEE YOU. Help people feel noticed. I think this is a powerful statement when talking about helping someone feel like they matter. I think many people do not feel seen or heard. They are just, almost, existing. Here are a few basics: Smiling is a simple way to help someone—anyone feel noticed. Saying hello and acknowledging another. Giving a warm hug. Give a genuine thank you in all you do [whether it is thanking a waiter for their cheerful attitude or being prompt or positive to thanking someone you see every day with a sincere note, take the time to say thank you]. Actively listen and make time to truly see and acknowledge them. Pay attention. Listen and hear what they are saying (be aware to not be listening & thinking about your own response) Another part of listening is paying attention to what they are saying, so you can recall details about their life, their favorites, their interests, etc. & be able to talk to them about those things at later dates. Put away your phone! Send a text with a kind note just to check on them and connect. Look someone in the eyes when you are in their presence and let them know how glad you are they are there with you. Be fully present.
YOU MATTER. Help others see they are important. How can we help others know they matter? Well, be responsive. Who definitely feels a lack of mattering when you send a text, it says its been read but you get no response, Right? OR, when you are with someone & they get a message from someone else & they have to look at their phone or respond at that same moment. It doesn’t make you feel very important, or that they are being present with you, right? Another thing you can do to show others they matter, be interested in them, genuinely care, and ask questions. My daughter gets so frustrated with the dating game because so many of the guys she talks to or dates are so one sided. They don’t seem to ever ask or be interested in her. They respond with answers about their day, their interests…rarely ask about her. That does not make her feel like she matters to them.
What else can we do to help others know they matter? Keep good eye contact, do personal, interested check-ins on their lives and what is important to them. [ex: my daughter loves to keep people’s bdays in her calendar so she can send a fun shoutout to friends and family on their day. When possible she sends it in a group text so others can chime in with additional messages] Give an authentic compliment. Genuinely listening to someone will really let them know that they matter. When you ask a question, wait for an answer. Give a gift to show someone they matter, whether it is a gift of your time or a small token of your appreciation, like a meal, a drawing or poem you create, a song you share, a memory you make together, etc.
YOU ARE NEEDED. Help others see they are needed. Praise and appreciate others and let them know they are necessary in your life, your community, organization, work, school, etc. People need to hear specific positive strengths, the difference they are making, why they are needed. How to do that? Ask someone their thoughts or opinions on a specific topic or perspective. Share with others what makes them special or needed to you on a personal level. Be specific when sharing your feelings [ie: “I love and appreciate you” vs “I love that you are in my life, you bring such a playful, light-hearted attitude to our relationship.”] When you depend and build trust with someone it tells them they are needed.
MATTERING CREATES PURPOSE. I know when it came to my brother and his mental wellness I always tried to be there to talk him off a ledge or guide him towards getting help for his addictions. I would send him positive books or podcasts to hopefully help him feel better, etc. I felt I had some purpose in helping his life matter. That then also gave me the satisfaction of feeling like I mattered to someone. When my brother died, my mom in tears said, ” he doesn’t need me anymore.” My heart ached for her because she felt like a piece of her purpose was gone. It is like a circle of purpose in meeting one another’s needs in a way. Whether we smile at a stranger, pick up a sea star and send it back into the ocean, volunteer to tutor kids after school, pick up trash at a nearby park, coach little league, or answer calls on a help line, etc. We can find a sense of purpose…a place or action that helps us feel value, which helps us matter overall.
Experiencing mattering also reaffirms that we contribute to others and that we have a purpose. A sense of purpose is associated with increased dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin, also known as the “happiness trifecta,” the neurotransmitters that control for mood, movement, and motivation.-zachmercurio.com
DONT FORGET YOU. Incredible YOU! You matter. It is easier sometimes to focus on all the ways we don’t get noticed or appreciated. You may need to really focus and evaluate the real impact you have on the lives around you. You may have to compliment yourself and notice your gifts, talents and strengths. You may have to seek and find the ways you try to utilize your skillset for the greater good. You may have moments where YOU need to remind yourself of why and how you matter. That is okay.
DONT COMPARE and DESPAIR. That is one of the quickest ways to kill your personal story on why you matter. Many people can easily jump on social media and see friends, family, colleagues and quickly feel a lack of connection or value on some level. When you start comparing, it is that much easier to feel inadequate in the areas where you really matter. Your self-esteem gets a check and you can quickly spiral into despair. You cannot compare your value to those around you. You are your own version—you live your own value in all you do.
I hope this article helps you find ways to help those around you FEEL like they matter.
We are all in this together, so be mindful of how you make others feel. Others around you know they matter because of YOU and how you treat them.
According to many—New Years marks a day in which we begin some sort of New Obsession—we change our eating habits, we begin running, we start journaling, we promise to meditate, we start penciling in more…seeing a therapist, doing a cleanse, organizing a room, making kids start new rules and regulations…starting ‘a new’ with some sort of new habit…some type of re-wire…some sort of obsession, right!?! Well, to each their own. haha.
I am choosing TREASURE. YOU DECIDE.
YOU DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT THIS YEAR.
The very word, “TREASURE” has a great connotation to it…by definition, “a quantity of precious metals, gems, or other valuable objects.” We often associate it with a treasure hunt, finding buried treasure, seeking some sort of treasure, whether it is a personal journey to find our own pleasures, pursuits, direction, values, etc. There is a treasure within to find. OR there is also, the “things or objects” treasure in which you seek things outside of yourself. BOTH will bring enJOYment on some level, but you need to find out what will bring the real FULFILLMENT. I just had a great visual…a metaphor, if you will. Bare with me for a minute. IMAGINE…An empty treasure chest that needs to be FULL and FILLED…but with what?? Look at it like your life. Ask yourself—What do you want to fill it with? What will make it FEEL FULL and truly rewarding? Life is FULL of treasures of various shapes, sizes, values, decisions, lessons learned, relationships made. It is the small jewels and gems of a life well lived that will make you truly RICH.
When you are young the world tells you that once you get this or that, make more money or have two houses or this job or $$ per year….you will finally be happy. But as you grow wiser you begin to see it is the experiences, the memories made, the moments collected that truly create a wealth of immeasurable riches.
“Remember that wherever your heart is, there you will
find your treasure.” -Paulo Coelho
What will you select of put inside as your treasure? Will it be gold coins to be saved up for a day to finally spend them? Will it be collectibles that increase in value? Will it be a trip of a lifetime that will hold priceless memories, Will it be precious time and memorable moments with your family, or will it be education and experiences that you can learn and share throughout your lifetime?
I think you can do a little bit of everything as long as you find a happy balance for your life. The riches can allow you to dream a little bigger and find those places to wander. Maybe it is fun for you to literally treasure hunt. I know for me, I love a goodwill treasure hunt to see if I can spot a unique piece of antique jewelry or a valuable bowl of pottery. Or maybe, you want to utilize some of your riches to take a photography class that will be an investment in yourself. If you can take the time to learn, dream a little bigger, educate yourself to further your future, and then place it all in the treasure chest of your choosing….a balanced life can have many variables and special pieces held inside.
“There’s a treasure hidden in every moment.
The JOY of life is finding it”. -Katrina Mayer
Life can be a bit daunting and you may struggle to know what you truly want for your life. (What you want in your treasure chest) You may need to play, experiment with things that bring you joy, invite friends to share their experiences of finding treasures and priceless gifts in their life. It is a process to find what brings meaning, it takes time to educate yourself on the necessary experiences to find your true treasures. You may have to stop, look around, evaluate where you are, what you have, what you need and do a little more digging on some level. It is YOUR life…YOUR treasure. YOU need to figure out where the value really lies. What the treasures really are to YOU. Everyone is different. One person may fill their chest up with a collection of Air Jordan shoes waiting for a pay day, while someone else may leave it empty until they can fill it with albums of photos or souvenirs from trips around the world. Maybe you fill it with books because you find such value in the words and lessons expressed by others. What is priceless to one, may be a different value to another. We are each uniquely made and that is why it is very important to take the time to figure out what YOU need on varying levels of your life.
“Your life is a treasure and you are so much
more than you know.” -Richard Bach
Life is a precious gift. Treasure it.
LIFE IS A TREASURE. Take the time to seek and find the right keys that unlock the authentic treasures you need for your best life. What makes a great life to one may be something completely different for another. Seek and find what YOU need. You have this ONE, unique, powerful, exhilarating, challenging, soul seeking, beautiful life that is truly so short. Don’t waste it…treasure it!
After losing my younger brother tragically this year, I hope I can make more promises to myself to seek greater experiences, to risk the mundane & shake things up, to get out of being comfortable and push myself to be even better than before. The richest treasures are in our LIFE…the little details that bring us the biggest JOYS, the people we love and get to enJOY, the places that are extraordinary that we get to experience, the gifts of learning and growth, the opportunity to LOVE more than we did yesterday, to pray more, to seek beyond what we know, to live the challenges we can push beyond, the highs and lows, the stuff that makes us FEEL EVERYTHING. LIFE IS IN SESSION. I love that!! I strive to continue to LIVE IT!! TREASURE IT!! to my best ability.
What will be your greatest treasures
you find this New year?
Peace. Love and Light to you this New Year. May you seek and find what YOU need. xoxo. -H
Sadly, I think a very human tendency is to judge. We get into habits of people watching and noticing and…seeing what WE think is. Well, I LOVE situations that challenge any moment of judgement.
My husband and I were stopping to get gas and an attendant was walking up. An older man with long, straggly, grey hair, long beard, tattoos, huge ear gages, lots of jewelry and leather bracelets…he looked like an older member of a biker gang or something. I wasn’t sure how gruff or what temperament we would get. He approached the car. I instantly said, “How are you doing?” He replied optimistically, “No problems!” I smiled, “Wow. [I quickly looked at his name tag] Bronson, where did this attitude come from?” He said, “My grandfather once told me, “Happiness is a choice.” Now I have had a hell of a life, full of trouble. I finally woke up one day and thought that maybe I should take my grandfather’s advice and try happiness. I kept trying and trying until it stuck. I found happiness is a choice.” He beamed and kept at his work.
I quickly shuffled through my purse and pulled out one of my favorite “thoughtful” cards and wrote a little note to our new gas attendant & expressed our gratitude for his great attitude. He genuinely took the card with a smile.
It was such a wonderful moment of connection with a stranger.
I LOVE and appreciate those moments that continually challenge us to be open and just love.
Connection is that gift that is always available—if we take the time to open the door to another.
May we always seek the gifts that are available in another.
“Connecting with others gives us a sense of inclusion, connection, interaction, safety, and community. Your vibe attracts your tribe, so if you want to attract positive and healthy relationships, be one! Staying connected and getting reconnected feeds the flow of goodness which empowers our humanity.” ― Susan C. Young
“I believe connection is needed more today than ever. When we allow ourselves to listen with our hearts we are then able to be truly present.” ― Debbie Payne
“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.” – Mother Teresa
I hope this little story of connection makes you smile and brings a little happiness to your day.
Connect. Love. Share a smile. Make a friend. Be a gift to someone’s day.
Where did the word connection come from? Etymology.[the study of the origin of words] From Middle English conneccioun, connexioun, conneccyon, conneccion, from Latin connexionem (nominative connexio (“a conclusion, binding together”)), from connectō, an alternative spelling of cōnectō (“I bind together”), from compound of co- (“together”) and nectō (“I bind”).
So, to bind together is a beautiful way to describe our need for connection. Like a coming together to bind or bond. Last night my husband and I were whale watching from a bench along the Oregon coast when a young man stood near us looking out into the vast horizon. We started to talk to him and shared with him that there were a number of whales to see. He perked right up. We knew he was not local and began to ask questions and inquire where he was from. He chimed in & told us he was from Germany. He began to tell us about his bike excursion down the coast & that he had been traveling for months through Canada, and just left Washington and was headed to California. Then a whale blew & he began to see the number of whales, “That is a lot of whales,” He smiled. We smiled and kept asking him questions. We then invited him to come stay for a meal, shower and a good night sleep in a bed. He thought for a moment and then said, “Yes. I accept your invitation.” We directed him to some cliffs beyond the bench and told him we would throw his bike in our truck and head out shortly.
It was such a fun evening getting to connect with a complete stranger from a foreign land. We had him share his highlights of dog-mushing in Canada, learned about his siblings and family in Germany, talked about the Ukrainian war and its impact in Europe, back and forth we shared over Mexican food by our outdoor fire pit. We all walked the beach together, watched the sun set and then relaxed for the evening with more questions and the movie, “The Life of Walter Mitty.” Our new friend, Marios took it all in and was so gracious in all he did. He snacked, smiled and indulged us when we told him he had to try one of our favorite, relaxing, family rituals…footie socks! He looked at us very strange and said, “What are footie socks?” His puzzled face was priceless. We showed him how to apply the cheap, moisturizing foot socks & the whole family had them on while we watched the movie. He was amazed and took silly photos with our dogs and his socks. “Crazy Americans!” We all laughed.
It was a great time connecting with another human living a different experience. We are all like that. Different circumstances, thoughts, governments, ideas, beliefs, desires, culture, family…but in situations like this, we are all just people…getting to know one another, connecting, sharing, learning and caring.
Connection gives you new perspectives, it helps you see the world from various views, and allows you to just LOVE. We are just people. We are all in this together. We genuinely enjoyed hearing him share stories about different people he has met along the way. He shared how he thought the trip would be harder and lonelier, but for him, he has felt more connected. He has met many people his age along the way, made new friends in various places and shared that when he started the trip he was much more introverted and shared that the journey has helped him so much.
It was wonderful. This morning I wrote him a small note to pass along our info. and stay connected. In the note, I attached the quote from the movie, Walter Mitty that was the Life Magazine Motto…
This movie, this quote, this connection with our new friend help solidify how important and life affirming connection truly is. We need to “find each other, and to feel.” There is real purpose and meaning when we get to notice and value another person and their journey. It is a beautiful gift.
Reach out and connect with a stranger, begin a conversation, open a door and smile, share in the tiny connections that help us find, feel and connect.
Thank you, Marios for being authentically you, being open and willing to be part of our family for a day and to share in your journey. What a gift. We are all gifts to one another if we open our hearts and seek the connections.
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