FAITH IT

FAITH IT

He has your back.

I wanted to share a few amazing stories that illustrate faith, belief and an ever knowing of a larger presence that fills our lives. The first is a very real and genuinely scary experience that recently happened to me.

My little family moved out of state and landed in a small cottage in a beautiful, serene, majestic area of the Pacific North West. It has literally been just over three months and there have been soo many emotions already.

Whenever you move (I have moved many times throughout my marriage–at least 15 times & four different states) there is always a bit of a transition period. It can be a fun adventure full of new experiences and new places or a time of stress. There is always a bit of both, because with any change comes growth. It can be exhilerating and tough all at the same time.

Well, things were going great! We were enjoying our new area, the beauty of this place, new people, etc. Exactly a month later, my parents came to visit & while we were walking the beach with them I came across a woman who was looking for small, red pebbles in the sand. I started to help her look & we began to talk. She asked where we had moved & I began to describe our new home & instantly her face went very sad. She said, “I know that house very well. My dear friends use to live there. Then she paused and said, “I probably shouldn’t say anything.”

I smiled, “You cant do that. What?” She preceeded to tell me that her dear friend had lost everything after her husband had killed himself. She felt bad, left my side and began to walk down the beach in my opposite direction. Obviously the conversation was hard for her.

I think I was in shock, stunned almost. I looked down the beach in the opposite direction at my family & knew I could not say anything. I needed to process this info. 

The next few weeks were tough. When my daughter & husband were gone on a couple work trips, I was left at home with our two, little dogs. I sat up every night with disturbing thoughts running through my head. I wondered where the suicide had happened. I wondered what the story was. I wondered if there was a bad spirit….my mind raced and worried.

It began to take me back to another point in time when my sweet husband had hit a very low point in his life, was depressed and couldn’t make sense of life. He wrote a letter to me & my daughter (who was four at the time) and took a shotgun up a canyon to end his life. Thankfully, he did not end things that day and we worked through depression and got him to a better place in his mind. It was a very emotionally tough time in our lives.

So, with this new information in our new home I became genuinely worried that maybe there could be a negative force or influence that could lead my husband back down that road. My mind began to swirl with worry, fear, negative thoughts of this new experience. 

I did not say anything to my husband about what I had learned for weeks and then I could not take it any longer. I had to tell him the information and that it had been eating me up inside. He was very supportive & said we could move any time & that we did not have to stay in this home if I felt unsure or dark about the situation.

Then, the very weekend my daughter was leaving us for her first college experience and moving away from us, something else unthinkable happened. My husband got a phone call, he gets off the phone and explains that this man had called and was looking for information on the recent sale of our home. He was talking about how he was an appraiser, he wanted to see our documents, was inquiring about info.

My husband said it was a nice call, but strange that the man wanted us to send copies of our contracts to him. My husband never got his name. That evening, our little family was watching a movie when my husband received a text from the same man inquiring about our moving info. and shares his name…Joe Dejel (I did change his name). My husband starts saying the mans name out loud & says, “why is that name so familiar? Who is this guy?”

I about died and I am sure my face turned a few shades grey. I responded, “are you serious right now? Are you serious?”  I then reminded my husband that Joe Dejel was the guy who had been stalking me 13-14 years ago. 

My daughter was sitting between us & becomes genuinely concerned. Like we all were.

Joe Dejel had been following me around our neighborhood for months & then showed up randomly at a CPR class I was taking to get certified as a yoga teacher. He had followed me over 30 minutes away from my home. When the leaders of the class asked his name & noticed he was not on any list I was terrified but also relieved because I was able to at least get his name. It was a terrifying experience to feel like someone is watching and following you. I got the police involved, found out where he lived so I could find out the make of his car & empower myself with knowledge. It was the most unsettling, power sucking feeling and experience.

So, to have this same man call my husband looking for info. having our old address in hand and trying to find out where we had moved, was definitely unsettling to say the least.

My whole body began to panic, everything began to weigh on me, “Why was this happening? Why would God do this? Why would he have two terrible experiences (my husband’s depression/suicide & this man stalking me) that happened so close together be almost playing out again in our lives…..my mind swirled, hashing and thrashing, unsettled, angry, fearful, trapped in worry and soo concerned and unable to understand what I was suppose to learn or what we needed to do. I became a wreck and my sweet husband was genuinely concerned.

My daughter was literally starting college two days later & that was the main reason we moved out of state so we could be a good support system to her in her time of transition & now this!!

I felt terrible for the fear that was brought on. My daughter was genuinely scared for me & jumped on her computer and started changing all of her personal emails, so she could not be found.

It was crazy!!

For a few days, I was a wreck. I was beside myself with worry and concern why this man was showing up in our lives again.  

It seemed like a very scary and difficult time in my life was showing up all over again and it was more than unsettling. Panic, fear, fear for my family, my daughter going off to college, so many emotions and feelings were welling up inside. 

I tried to be strong while we got my daughter off to college. I did not want her scared and worried about whether or not her mom was going to be okay. My daughter had been with me every day of her life, home-schooled & college was her first real experience to be around other people, socialize and find her wings. I was not going to have it all ruined or over-shadowed by a man and his possible intentions. 

We got our daughter off to college. She was still worried because my husband travels for work, so I would be home alone for days at a time. Our little home is surrounded by dark woods, so my daughter was genuinely concerned. “Shouldn’t we call the police,” she shared. 

I tried to calm her anxiety by telling her I would do what I did before, make sure we notify our realtors and neighbors to not share any info of our whereabouts & tried to reassure her that he would have to find a way in through our newly gated community.

She left feeling a little better. 

Luckily, I had a strong front for her but as soon as we got back to our new home, the fear would envelope me and I did not know how to stop it. For a couple of days I pleaded with my husband trying to understand why God would place both of these situations back into our lives. I desperately tried to come to a realization or seek to find some reasoning. My mind whirled with fear, anxiety, concerns of the unknown. 

My husband and I laid in bed Tuesday, September 21 (we dropped our daughter off on the 19th)  and after days of emotions we had the longest night and felt a heaviness within our hearts. My mind went from anger about no one telling us about a suicide to fear of someone breaking in and hurting us. I was jumping from one emotion to another, concerned our daughter was safe, wondering if we should move, feeling so alone and wondering why God would make us feel like this after just moving here. Soo many emotions. 

My sweet husband gently said, “We don’t have to stay here. We can go anywhere. If you don’t feel safe or you feel an energy in this home that is not good for you or our family, we can go.”

Neither of us slept the entire night. We kept talking and fretting about feelings, actions, trying to understand. I was a wreck and he just kept trying to do his best to console me.

The very next day I received ONE message from a sweet niece on my husbands side. She had just started college a month before our daughter, so I had been sending her little text messages of encouragement and love. Our communication was sweet, but just the regular Hellos and happenings. She had never sent me quotes or anything other than personal hello messages.

BUT, that particular morning I received just this quote in a text…this is what it said

“If the devil can’t take you out, he will try to wear you out. Stop obsessing, stop ruimating, stop scheming. Stop rehashing. Stop analyzing. Stop worrying. Give it to God and go to sleep. Since God never slumbers nor sleeps, there’s no use both of you staying awake.”

She said nothing. Only the quote was sent with a couple heart emojis. 

I read it and a peace like nothing I have ever experienced washed over me. I instantly ran to my husband and read him the message. We both looked at each other and said, “Wow.”

It was an answer to prayer, it was a calm like no other. Since that moment I have felt a peace and a knowing that God has our back. Whatever will be perfectly planned. He has taken our worries and freed me. I instantly felt safe. I have felt nothing but a sweet knowing that He is there and knows our every need.

That is the greatest gift. 

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Zennon story.

I have been walking and walking while getting back in tune with listening to those things that inspire my heart and help me become a better version of myself. What God needs me to be.

I was listening to an incredible podcast…Good Life Project was interviewing Shelly Tygielski

Wow! what an inspiring woman with an incredile story. It was such a fun listen. LISTEN TO IT!

She had soo many great stories to share, but I LOVE a good Godwink story & she had a pretty incredible one. She was talking about her father-in-law and the wonderful man he was. She loved his spirit, but said he always hated the name he was given. For years he would not go by his usual name, Zennon. He told people to call him Chuck. Later in life he began to go by his given name.

Shelly shared that he was getting up there in age, to the point where the family decided to put him in a home. He hated it! He teased that he didn’t like old people. He had a lively spirit, so when covid hit and his facility was effected, it took its toll on Zennon. He contracted covid and was not expected to make it. The family was devestated and because of the situation no family could see him, but by some miracle, some end of life fight, Zennon tested negtive in his final days and family could come and give their goodbyes. 

Shelly and her husband flew to his bedside and were able to give their goodbyes.

She then talked about how hard it was to lose him and was trying to find some consolation in his parting, so she would ask for some sort of sign from Zennon that he was okay. She was so hopeful for some grand sign, but did not see or feel anything. 

It was time for her and her husband to head home, so they had called for a car to take them to  the airport. 

In the hussle of packing and preparing to leave, Shelly’s phone went off with an incoming message. She froze, in shock she yelled to her husband. He rushed to her, “are you okay? Did you forget something?’ Shelly looked at him in disbelief and showed him the phone, “Your Dad is coming to pick us up!” she exclaimed!! Her husband was worried, “are you okay?” He then looked at the phone and noticed the person coming to pick them up was “Zennon”

Sure enough her sign had come and Zennon picked them up and was driving the exact car her father-in-law drove.

Such a great story. The bigger, grander picture. The other side is closer than we can imagine.

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I genuinely hope and pray that these stories will leave you feeling peace and comfort in a knowing that God has your back and that there is a bigger picture for your life. Have faith in that!

Peace, Love and Light to you today. -H

Do you strive to live in Grace or Nature

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Yesterday I was down & decided to put in a movie, The Tree of Life. It was a movie full of imagery, music, thought, story…visually it stirred my soul, but the other aspect of the story line was the way we live our lives. Held within the story walls was an emotional war between the mother (who strived to live in a place of grace) and a father who was driven by human nature.

It made me wonder how to hold onto those directions we strive to live in our life. How do you hold on to the need for grace, for light, for love and not be distracted by the fears, ego, society…

So, I am going to google, “How to hold on to grace in our life” and see what comes up. I will leave you my findings to then sprinkle them into your own life. Peace to you.

ego_search_for_wholeness.jpgSo, I came across a definition by Dallas Willard that says,

“Grace is God acting in our life.”

To me this is EVERYTHING…every detail, every gift we hold, every breath we take, every laughter, every moment. Through all things God is acting in our life. Everywhere you look, the breeze, the colors, the sounds, the scents, the smiles, the majestic mountains, the crashing seas, the hands that hold one another, the babies born, the muscles that walk, the eyes that see, the hopes, the dreams, the challenge, the changes, the soul of life, it is bigger than anything and everything.

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“For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”     We must have faith and a knowing that when challenges occur, there is a bigger plan surrounding us. We must look for the seed in which we can grow in this seemingly dark place.     This makes me think of a dear friend of ours who is in her forties, is in the beginning stages of a late pregnancy, and just had a full blown stroke. I also think of my sister-in-law who has triplets and today is taking one of them in to find out if she has cerebral palsy at the sweet age of two.    My heart weeps for them, my soul is stirred in aching pain, trying to understand the challenges they are facing. I can’t even imagine. BUT, it also makes me see how precious each day is, that life is too short, that we must strive to live, to love, to have faith in tomorrow.

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“And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” (2 Corinthians 9:8)

Look all around you. Have you not been given much? Do your eyes see? Do your legs hold you high? Do you hear a whisper from your child? Do you see the sunlight shine down on you? Do you have hope? Do you have love in your heart? Have hope that you have all you need at this very moment. Have a knowing that He will provide for your every need.

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Always have faith that God can be your refuge & will give you strength in your time of need.  I do find comfort in feeling that when I need Him, He is there. I feel that I am not alone in this world & that I am just a prayer away.  I have been reading a sweet book called, “Where angels walk” by Joan Wester Anderson. It is a book full of beautiful stories of angels who have come to the aid of children who were about to be harmed, protected women in scary situations, carried a young boy home who had been bit by a rattlesnake…heaven is closer than we know. Nothing separates us but ourselves. I believe if we call on heavenly forces to help us, they will do all they can to be there.

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“Nothing can separate us from the Love of God.” -Romans 8

Isn’t that a beautiful idea. NOTHING can come between us, so we must have faith that we can call on Him, call on angels, know that whatever we are going through, whatever we have to face, we are so close to heaven.

I thought this was funny…God has no phone, but I talk to Him. He has no Facebook, but He is still my friend. He does not have Twitter, but I still follow Him.  Nothing can separate us from Him, except us. He longs to be near, He longs to hear your prayers. He is there and nothing can separate us from that love.

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Ask and ye shall receive

According to Lifecoach Cheryl Richardson, “I’ve learned now, in working in partnership [with God] and dancing with grace, that when I need direction, I will ask for it.” Cheryl says she uses this mantra: “Give me direction. Let me see the doors that are open, make sure that I see them and open those doors.Answers are around you all the time, but the question is, how present are you to them? “The more present you become to your life, the more you begin to see that there are signs all around you,” Cheryl says.

Take note when you begin to judge or shut down what someone’s saying to you and try to stay open-minded, Cheryl says. “What if everyone that comes into our life is a spiritual change agent in some way? The more open you can be, the more you allow your life to change and the more you see the influence of grace,” she says. “A closed mind is the barrier to living a grace-filled life.”When you see signs of grace in your life, you’re entering into “the dance,” Cheryl says. The dance of grace represents your psychological growth: You realize there are coincidences that occur in your life and recognize that it is part of this divine intelligence working in your life. “As you begin to see those signs, you realize, ‘Wow, I am co-creating [my life] with some kind of spiritual intelligence here.'”

Cheryl says it’s also important to listen, pay attention and take action. “When you get the messages, you need to act on them,” she says.

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Finding-Grace-in-Your-Life#ixzz3k1s6yBAf


Well, that is all for today. I hope these scriptures and thoughts will give you something to think about. I think just looking for the many ways God is Acting in Your Life each day and finding gratitude in those things will open the doors to grace in your life, which will then mirror into the lives of those around you. Peace to you today.  -H

Have a little FAITH in Me.

Image“The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely, or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quite alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy amidst the simple beauty of nature…I firmly believe that nature brings solace in all troubles.”  -Anne Frank

It always amazes me when you sit outside and notice the tiny details all around.

A couple days ago I noticed in my Maple tree hundreds of lady bug casings. At first my heart sank as I thought these little bugs had gotten stuck in the sap and perished. Then I looked closer, on other leaves there were little black and red, fuzzy-like caterpillars. I had my husband come to see if he could understand what was happening—was it a tree of transformation?? We googled the lifecycle of a ladybug and sure enough…We have a ladybug tree!! Thousands of eggs gently laid on the large Maple tree leaves. You can see the life stages throughout the tree. Miraculous!!

Just like transformation–Life changes can be hard. My husband is still going through the process of job jumping and it is not getting any easier. It is hard to see him frustrated by how long things take, how many interviews need to be done, the assessments, the call backs…

But then I see these details in nature and I am quickly reminded—everything has a perfect timing, everything grows and changes, the flow of all that is—is perfect. Nothing is left undone or forgotten. There is patience in growth. There is wisdom in waiting. There is challenge and struggle in all things. There is hope held within a new day.

If we can continue to remember this— everything happens with PURPOSE. everything moves in perfect TIMING. everything is given with GROWTH in mind. everything grows in OPPORTUNITY. everything is clear and clarity is given within the PRESENT of this moment. SEEK. LISTEN. FIND the ANSWERS within. We will begin to understand ALL is as it should be right NOW.

God just wants us to stop and seek Him. He wants us to move from doing to be open to seeking His guidance. He knows what is best for our life. He is just waiting for us to trust in Him and His guidance.

Everything around us is being done, the sun rises, the flowers bloom, the streams flow, the wind blows, the moon appears. When we are willing to stop trying to do everything on our own and have the faith that He is listening and waiting patiently to help us do anything and everything.

We must try to have a little FAITH in that!!

This reminds me of a beautiful song “Have a little faith in me.” I am going to put a couple links to a couple video clips of people singing this song. These two versions were my favorites. Just close your eyes and listen to the words.  It correlates to having faith in someone else–whether it is someone you love or I also like to think that it is having faith in God & knowing he is there through the good, the bad, the dark…etc.

This is a great version by Charly Luske  

Here is another version + video of Mandy Moore singing the same song   

Well, that is my thought for today. I hope it helps you in anything and everything you do.  Best wishes for a beautiful day.  -Heather

Ways to Fall in LOVE with your Life

SimpleWomanonRugIn the true spirit of the month of LOVE, I thought it would be a good idea to not only fall in LOVE with relationships, but with the life we are living at this moment. Here are some thoughts on falling in love with the life you have.

See the BEAUTY all around you–“A person should hear a little music, read a little poetry and see a fine picture everyday in order that worldly cares may not obliterate the sense of the beautiful which God has implanted in the human soul.”  -Johann Von Goethe

Be still. Get QUIET–“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature-trees, flowers, grass-grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence…we need silence to be able to touch souls.”  -Mother Teresa

Do a little SOUL searching“Anytime we catch a glimpse of soul, beauty is there; anytime we catch our breath and feel “how beautiful!” The soul is present.” -Jean Shinoda Boten, MD

Find a little JOY–“Always leave enough room in your life to do something that makes you happy, satisfied or even JOYOUS.” -Paul Hawken

Find COMFORT in knowing you are not alone–“Ever now and again take a good look at something not made with hands–a mountain, a star, the turn of a stream. There will come to you wisdom and patience and solace and above all, the assurance that you are not alone in the world.” -Sidney Lovett

BELIEVE in the GIFT of every day–“Life is a great and wondrous mystery and the only thing we know that we have for sure is what is right here, right now. Don’t miss it.” -Leo Buscaglia

Believe that your LIFE is SACRED–“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.” -Thornton Wilder

Blessed be the month of LOVE and the life you live be a beautiful reminder of the gifts you receive daily.  -Heather