I am the last person to be preaching to anyone. I grew up in a religion that many in the world would say is cult-like, with high-priests, bishops, Strick standards, Heaven vs Hell and if you did not live up to certain practices you would end up in various hells, nowhere near your loved ones in the next life. I fell away from the practices and beliefs because I did not believe any God would complicate anything so much and that many organized religions actually separate people instead of connecting them. Ultimately, LOVE is the basic religion anyone should live. IF you can strive to live in LOVE and begin to see and shine that love in others, the world will be better.
I LOVE to see the authentic smile on this woman’s face. Emotion drives feeling. Feelings fuel us. Live from those beautiful emotions that bring such joy and harmony to one’s life…LOVE is a driving force in all you do. Hold tight to it. Chase it. Live it and constantly choose LOVE over FEAR. There is a greater depth to that life.
How can we begin to see and live LOVE?
BE AN EXAMPLE OF LOVE: “How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.” —Rupi Kaur I was in a conversation with my brother, who very recently has been drinking very heavily and it genuinely scares me. His soul is becoming jaded from good things and he is seeking and living in so much anger. My conversation with him went like this, “I am trying to influence my family to help them see they are being lied to about various things but they won’t listen.” I calmly responded, “How can you influence anyone for good with so much anger. You must come from a place of love and be an example of this love over any place of anger or ill-will.”
Seek to not judge or find criticism with others . Be lovingly approachable in any circumstance . Seek to grow in love daily by becoming a little bit better each day . Look for ways to be there for another and be the support and encouragement they need . Be someone’s reason to smile . Being honest with your feelings and not falling victim to playing small because of someone else . Seeking to trust another and being a person who is trustworthy . Speaking kindly about others & if you have unkind feelings, not sharing them with others . Stop gossip or spilling the tea . Be the bigger person in a challenging situation .
CHOOSE LOVE OVER FEAR: “I believe that every single event in life happens in an opportunity to choose love over fear.” -Oprah Love is a higher energy, so striving to live from love over any energy of fear will have a huge impact on your life. [I like this–this helps describe this energy: According to science, human beings, just like other creatures, radiate electromagnetic fields from the heart. When you love someone, you can radiate thoughts, feelings, and emotions at the same rhythm. When you achieve coherence in your vibrations and emit higher vibrations, you experience more benefits. It is easier to make decisions and device solutions since your discernment is clear. You also have an easier time deflecting negative attitudes and emotions such as frustration, anxiety, impatience and chronic stress that strains your reasoning.Overall, you will experience more composure when your vibrations are higher. However, it can be hard to maintain a constant flow of high vibrations. If you describe love as a combination of qualities such as attentive care, affection, kindness, gratitude, and compassion, then you experience more love and give more love when these qualities surround you. Low vibrations come from feelings of anger, rage, unfairness, and fear.-taken from The Spring Resort and Spa]
BE LOVE TO YOURSELF: “You carry so much love in your heart. Give some to yourself.” “It’s really about changing the conversation. It’s not about perfection. It’s about purpose. We have to care about our bodies and what we put in them. Women have to take the time to focus on our mental health—take time for self, for the spiritual, without feeling guilty or selfish. The world will see you the way you see you and treat you the way you treat yourself.” —Beyoncé. Stop being mean to yourself with negative thoughts, harsh emotions, and begin to do things that help you appreciate, nourish and love who you are & who you are striving to become. Whether it is insecurities, body-image issues, you still need to remind yourself of the beautiful things that make you, YOU. Find appreciation for your body. See and believe in the constant wins of gratitude you feel each day. Tell yourself empowering affirmations every morning and go to bed thinking of the good from your day. Fill your life with love in all you do.
CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE: “You do not just wake up and become the butterfly—growth is a process.” —Rupi Kaur Instead of blaming or getting angery at struggles and challenges that come into your life. Change or reframe it to look at the situations as opportunities for growth and personal learning.
SEE OTHERS WITH LOVE & COMPASSION: “A person learns how to love himself through the simple acts of loving and being loved by someone else.” —Haruki Murakami. When someone else is angry or unkind remind yourself that everyone is on their own journey. Have patience, love and kindness.
Seek to avoid judging others and their situations. “Love is the absence of judgment.” —Dalai Lama This is easier said than done. I have this lesson continually popping up throughout my life. It is an ongoing practice. Where I currently live there is a large homeless problem within 30 minutes and I find myself having a hard time not judging the crazy guy walking down the street carrying a Jesus cross or people pulling suitcases across a busy street into a wooded lane. I am a work in progress and I just continue to send them a prayer of hope. There are so many broken people traumatized by life. I am humbly reminded of this daily.
EVEN LIVING LOVE YOU NEED BOUNDARIES: “Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves even when we risk disappointing others.” —Brené Brown. I was talking with one of my sisters yesterday about a family dilemma she was having with a new brother-in-law that had offended her to a very serious degree. I asked her how she was going to handle seeing him in the future. She said, “I had to pay my therapist some money to get her input on this and she told me to be polite, but that I should never feel I need to go to his home because that could fuel some additional emotions. She told me to ‘have other commitments’ at the time.” The therapist told my sister that she still needed to have her own boundaries—even with family. I would say with family, there are many occasions for personal boundaries. smile. smile. I love a thought that Wayne Dyer (Rest In Peace, Wayne. Love you) would always share and that was, “Everything is an invitation not an obligation.”
LIVE YOUR POWER AUTHENTICALLY: “Find out who you are and be that person. That’s what your soul was put on this Earth to be. Find that truth, live that truth and everything else will come.” -Ellen Degeneres Living love is finding and accessing the part of you that can speak your truth and ask for those things that you need for your life. When you allow others to make you feel small, take your power, make you change or strive to alter your values, you need to step back and evaluate who and what you are giving your power to. YOU are the one and only YOU that will ever be. You may be the one person who was sent here to share a message, create a song, bring about change, inspire a nation, give to a cause, alter a moment. You need to do all you can to live your authentic life and be on purpose for the greater good.
YOU CHOOSE LOVE: “Follow your heart. Your heart is the right guide in everything big. Mine is so limited. What you want to do is determined by that divine element that is in each of us.” -Khalil Gibran. In all you do you evaluate if it is going to serve your life for a better purpose or make you feel inadequate in some way. We are humans. We have feelings that guide us along, but it is only when we try to tune into our FEELINGS that we get to higher places as people. Our feelings are meant to guide us. If you feel good–go…follow your heart or your inner feelings, but if you feel bad then you also need to follow that inner guidance. This is true with anything—thoughts, words we say to ourselves, feelings we have, people in our life, food, addictions, direction, etc. Follow YOUR feelings with LOVE being your guide.
SHIFT IT TO LOVE: “A miracle is a shift in perception from fear to love.” -Marianne Williamson. We all have moments, bad days, tears, trauma, so we need to be conscious of when we are getting stuck. When we get sad, have a blue-cloud day or seem to be sinking into emotions that don’t go anywhere good, we need to shift it. The way to do that…get moving, get outside, do things that are going to fill you with good feelings, which will help lead you back to the higher energy of love. I am usually a pretty positive and upbeat person, but I have my days and moments too. Yesterday was one of those days–my hormones were out of wack and I was sinking quick!! My husband got me outside and I ran to the sunshine. Sometimes you just need to seek the light, even sunlight.
GIVE LOVE: “There is hardly a more gracious gift that we can offer somebody than to accept them fully, to love them almost despite themselves.” -Elizabeth Gilbert. Praise and appreciate. Accept everyone for who and what they are. Namaste [is the very practice of seeing and appreciating the very light of another]. Just the act of sincerely listening. Being of service. Selflessly giving to benefit another . Seeking to be unconditional and selfless in your relationships . Seeking to not manipulate others for personal gain . Being the golden rule to treat another how you would like to be treated . Striving to always keep an awareness of another’s feelings & not wavering in seeking to not hurt or cause mistrust in your relationships . Care for those in your life with authenticity that you are there for them unconditionally.
KEEP YOUR LOVES IN ORDER: Augustine Aurelius set out to discover why it is that most people are so discontent in life. His conclusion was that for most of us, our loves are “out of order”; we have disordered loves. [nickcady.org]
The first time I read about Augustine and his out of order loves it hit me with such truth. When people get disillusioned with any type of addiction (sex, money, food, porn, gaming, selfishness, etc) their loves are out of order. They are choosing the addiction over something else in their life that should be of greater importance. [ie: alcohol addiction over relationship with their family] It makes so much sense. Then, do this exercise below. Evaluate how to help put your loves back into an appropriate and healthy order for your best life.
“It’s useful to sit down and just say, ‘What do I love? What are the things I really love? And in what order do I love them? Am I spending time so I’m spending time on my highest love? Or am I spending time on a lower love?'” Brooks says. “[Time], or your attention or your energy — all that stuff.” -Brooks [Huffington article]
I hope that some of these ideas can get you shifting from Fear to Love, choosing to live from a place of love, but also seeking to understand how and where your loves lie in the order of your life. LOVE is a higher place of living. We need to constantly be challenging our belief systems, practicing gentle nourishment of love with our selves, going beyond the fears that hinder us from growth and finding those deeper places within that yearn to just be LOVE. It is our nature. It is the sweetest depth of who we are. It is a place that feels like home, yet our human experience challenges and binds us to the ego spaces that we find hard to break free from. Follow the love in your life and constantly seek to live from that place.
-Peace, Love and Light to you today. -H xoxo

“Be lit up. Be unstoppable. Be a force of nature. Be a light in the dark. Be a wildfire for LOVE.”


SO, DOESNT IT MAKE SENSE WE AT LEAST TRY TO PRAY FOR THE WORLD AND THOSE WHO ARE ILL?? If studies can tell us ‘distant prayers’ have been answered in numerous ways, or how people who pray are healthier, then why would we not put our energy there and focus on FAITH not FEAR for our world.

Now, seriously. It was humbling and my heart ached for people who suffer from health issues. It made me think of my friend who was pregnant and had a stroke during her pregnancy. She lost mobility and memory. She struggled to find a reason for what had happened to her. She came to the realization that if it was for her child, she could struggle through & then she was thrown into the fire of losing that child. She wondered why. She began to question everything. She fell into a depression. She had not only lost physical mobility, she was now struggling with emotional mobility. She had other children she needed to take care of, so she had to go deep into her emotional reserve and find a place where she could begin to build again.
Do you have healthy children? If you need a little more realization on this go watchthe movie, “Miracles from Heaven.” My husband and I balled watching what that family had to go through and endure. It is based on a true story. Just imagine having a sick child & how difficult that would be. Go hug your children and thank the heavens that they are healthy and happy.
Two gifts you opened this morning–your eyes: You have the gift to see. There are many people who don’t take the time to look at the details, to notice the small gifts all around them. Read something. Go outside and look at the symmetry of leaves. Watch the clouds. Enjoy a sunrise or sunset. Notice color.
Do you have abundance? Whether it is fruit available for picking, a grocery store full of a variety of goods, running water, energy, family near, somewhere to live…My sister-in-law just moved to California. They had a house lined up to move into when they arrived, but the day they were to move in, the funding fell through. Luckily they had a trailer to live in while they are trying to work things out. My sister-in-law laughed as she explained their situation, “and I wanted to sell the trailer!” My response, “I bet you are glad you have it right now.” They are living in a trailer, but are abundant with love. They took a day as a family and made it a memory in Disneyland. She joked that they are homeless, but they are in Disneyland and enjoying it. Every situation is different, but if you can find the abundance wherever you are, you will find the gift within the situation.
Do you have love? We all come from love, but sometimes that gets lost in the confusion of life. You may be surrounded by friends and family who love you or you may have a best pet friend or maybe you are constantly searching for love. Do you love yourself? Love can be found in service, caring for another, holding the hand of someone afflicted, listening to someone in need…LOVE is everywhere, it is a gift that may be freely given or you may need to seek and find it. Love is in our nature.
Do you have a healthy body? Many of us take for granted and sometimes abuse the incredible gift we have been given–our body. It is an amazing piece of systematic genius. How are bodies function is a miracle & we do not have to do anything. It runs beautifully. Sometimes it is put on us to take better care of this amazing gift and we need to take it seriously. When we begin to break down, life becomes more difficult. We need to seek out good healthy habits. We need to find exercises we love. We need to sleep, drink water and do good things. Do you appreciate the ability to touch, to hear, to breathe, to taste yummy foods, etc. We need to be grateful for the health and happiness we have.
Do you appreciate being able to learn and grow? We have a great ability to learn anything with the help of the internet, youtube, connecting with others, etc. It is amazing!! We are only limited by what we do NOT do. Learn something new & guaranteed you will find a new zest for your life. You will begin to strive to seek out new things more often to enhance your life. You will learn and want to share with others around you. It is contagious! When we don’t seek out new things, we become stagnate and don’t grow. Take the time. It is worth it. Seek to learn something new each day, even if it is something small. You will fill it boost your day. I promise!
Do you have balance? Mind. Body. Spirit. All come together as a whole.
Some would say this is a slow moving movie, but I can appreciate a movie where you fall in love with the characters and wait to find out what happens to them and their stories. I loved seeing a sober side to Eddie Murphy (Mr. Church) and I also love Britt Robertson.
YOU ALWAYS HAVE TIME TO IMPROVE YOURSELF–Mr. Church was always doing something that improved his world–reading, writing, playing the piano, painting, cooking…he was a good example of this to “Charlotte”.
YOUR PAST DOES NOT HAVE TO DEFINE YOU–There may be dark secrets, hidden things about someone’s past, but it does not have to define them. Mr. Church gave and gave, but struggled with demons from his past.
ALWAYS BE KIND–Always be kind to others, you never know the impact you may have on someone else’s life. There was a sweet relationship between Charlotte (Charlie) and a guy named Larson. I don’t want to spoil it for you, so you will just have to watch.
LOVE IS A GIFT— The relationship between Charlie and her mother was sweet and very loving. In the end her mother worries that Charlie would only have memories of the pain of her dying and not all the love that was shared. That was a tear-filled scene. It was very heart wrenching.
“Go and do something good with your life” were Charlie’s last words to her childhood friend Owen.
I am a seeker of good things. Religion has always been a tough one to grasp for me on a personal level. I have always seen the lines of division and have a deep longing to understand things on a higher level. This movie talks to a variety of different religious leaders and seekers. It had some good lessons to share.
EVERYONE IS A SEEKER
IT IS INNER PEACE THAT LEADS TO OUTER PEACE
LOVE
THE MANY PATHS TO TRUTH
SPIRITUAL TRANSFORMATION
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT
Since the month of LOVE is quickly approaching, I thought it would be a good idea to post about LOVE. Not just “Love YOU” sentiments or valentine hearts and kisses, the LOVE that begins with YOU.

IN CLOSING

With Valentines around the corner I thought I would pass along some useful information that may help the relationship in your life. This past week my husband and I took a couple days to reconnect and spend some time together. My husband has been at a high-level stress with his work & our connection was a bit distant. We decided to take a couple days to get away. So, I invested in a relationship game, The Gottman Couples Retreat Board game, that I thought may be good to help us talk, connect, get out of the stresses of our daily life. It was a fun evening of writing little love notes to each other, playing the game, asking questions and stepping away from the day to day routine.
BUILD LOVE MAPS: LOVE Map: The principle of The Gottman Institute’s building Love Maps is simply this: knowing the little things about your partner’s life creates a strong foundation for your friendship and intimacy. How to do this–Ask Open Ended QUESTIONS: Here are some to get you started…What is your favorite memory of me? What is your favorite thing that I do for you? What movie reminds you of us? What do you think we need to work on the most in our relationship? Do you believe I love you? What is your favorite thing I ever did for a special occasion for you? When we are with family, do I make you feel important? What’s another career that you think you would love? What is a favorite memory with your Mom and Dad? Biggest dream location you would like to visit? What’s the happiest you have ever felt? Did you ever talk to your parents? What’s the accomplishment you are most proud of? Where do you want to be living in 10 years? Which of your friends would you choose if you had to be on a desert island with just one? Which would you like most: a summer home, a year-long vacation or a boat? What would you do with an extra $1000 to spend only on yourself? If you could see into the future, what would you want to know? What’s your greatest talent? What is your most unique trait? What is the best thing about our relationship? Are you an optimist, a pessimist or a realist? If you had to change one thing about yourself, what would you pick? How did your siblings shape who you are? What was your favorite date night we ever had? [taken from Lifehack]
OPPORTUNITY: Take opportunities to CONNECT–Go on a walk together & see if you can hold hands the entire time. TOUCH: kiss, high-five, hug, hold hands, tickle…touch & try to for a least 30 seconds. TALK: avoid the usual, “how was your day” and ask thought provoking questions. Sharing this little chat every night really can improve your relationship, says psychologist Angela Hicks, PhD, of Westminster University. She’s found that couples who discuss recent positive events with each other feel happier the next day, with increased feelings of intimacy and connection to their partners. [prevention] GET GRATEFUL: Let them know how much you appreciate them. Share the little and big things you appreciate and love about them. CREATE new memories together: no one wants the same old day in and out routine. Avoid boredom and try new things together. Stony Brook University social psychologist Arthur Aron, PhD. According to his research, novelty is the spice of life—and a key ingredient of a good marriage. You don’t have to give up your favorite couple-time activities, but do make an effort to inject some new plans into the mix: a hike, a cooking class, or even amusement park rides qualify. Just pick something you’ve never done before (or recently) together. Rewarding experiences flood your brain with dopamine, a mood-boosting chemical. “If your partner is present, that feeling becomes linked to him,” says Aron.[prevention] LAUGH: find things that make you laugh together, whether it is a favorite comedy show, a good joke, fun memories, share in the laughter. Appalachian State University study, experts asked 52 couples to reminisce about fun times they had experienced both alone and together; those who liked to recall shared laughs were most satisfied with their relationships. “When people laugh at the same thing, they validate each other’s opinions,” says lead author Doris Bazzini, PhD. [prevention] EXPRESS: do little things to show and express you care. Leave a little note on the mirror that says, I love you. Leave a warm robe or towel for them when they get out of the shower. Buy their favorite drink & write a note on the lid & leave it in the fridge. CELEBRATE: Do you smile when your partner comes home with a pat on the back from his boss or nudges his golf handicap down a point or two? Good, say UCLA psychologists, because the way you receive your significant other’s exciting news may be even more important than how you react during a crisis. In a study of 79 couples, partners who shared excitement for each other’s achievements (“Your hard work is paying off” versus “Can you handle that responsibility?” in response to a promotion, for example) had the most satisfying relationships. Interestingly, how a partner reacted to tough times wasn’t as closely tied to satisfaction. A celebration provides the opportunity to boost his ego and reinforce your status as a team, say the authors, so break out those champagne flutes and start saluting yourselves more often. [prevention]
GOT FACTS: Look at your relationship in a more objective manner. Stop playing the “blame game.” That is not helping anyone.

