It is funny how life keeps sharing the same lessons and you still find yourself wondering what you are missing from the experience. I have been going over some of my old blog posts and found a couple within the last three years that included some personal feelings. I was writing down the situations in which my husband was looking for work and how it was affecting me. I began to laugh to myself, noticing the very familiar feelings that I am having today. My husband has decided to leave his current job in pursuit of something better suited to his desires.
I am a big believer in doing something you enjoy, so I am very supportive of the move, but with any change comes a bit of discomfort, feelings of being lost and unsure where to go. I walk around my house wondering if I should be preparing to move, I look at my daughter and wonder if I should plan summer camps and fun activities or if it will all be in vein. It is “limbo” and I handle the feelings, but it is hard to not get sucked into the demanding mindset where you begin looking at the sky and saying, “What are we suppose to do!” I find myself constantly praying as I drive around looking for any “sign” or direction. I truly know God could deliver an answer at any time, so why not now!
I know, I know, “patience.” But, as I strive for patience, I also feel torn between “need” and “want.” It is not bad to need or want an answer, so I can then begin to move in a direction. That has to be better then sitting by wondering which direction to go. Sitting at the cross of two paths is fine, but isn’t it better to know which one to take and then begin. NOt just sitting and wondering, right?
Many people have their own thoughts, “God sometimes wants you to decide,” or “things will work out.” I know things will “work out” but its the in-between that is hard on me. The in-between is suppose to be that space where everything is clear. Like in meditation, there is always mention of “the space” “the gap between” so why is it so hard for me to be in-between. Why can’t I just go with the flow and wait for it to all work out?
So, today I am going to go on a personal pilgrimage of the online world to find some tips to help me get beyond the mundane of waiting, to move forward in some direction that will help my family. Wish me luck!!
TIPS TO MAKE BETTER DECISIONS: With anything you choose, you need to begin with making good choices, right? Right. My husband has made some great choices and it has led him to big learning and great opportunities, but in the last couple jobs there was more stress, which then affected his health and happiness.
The human mind hates uncertainty. Uncertainty implies volatility, randomness, and danger. When we notice information is missing, our brain raises a metaphorical red flag and says, “Pay attention. This could be important…” -Psychology Today
- Value is in the eye of the beholder: How much is a gallon of water worth? This question makes me think of the show “Alone” & how after a week everyone is valuing water, cheeseburgers, beer, etc extremely higher than if they were at home. They are valuing these things much higher than what others may take for granted. Always make decisions on your own: Sure, factor in other people’s opinions, but bear in mind that they may value things (very) differently. Blindly following other people’s advice may lead to disastrous decisions — even if they are based on “sound” advice from people with the best intentions of helping you.
- Know your goals before choosing: It may sound obvious at first, but it all boils down to your goals — knowing what you want out of the decision.But establishing a clear picture of your goals for decision making is not always trivial, and I don’t think people invest enough time to do it properly. This rings very true for me. When my husband took his last position I was very worried about the role & how it truly sat with him and his values. I know now that you need to make sure your values are in line with what you choose to do. When you align your actions with your life purpose and personal values, then it is much easier to know the direction that is right for you. -Self Improvement Saga
- Try the PrOACT Approach to Decision Making https://litemind.com/decision-making/ [Problem Statement / Objectives / Alternatives / Consequences / Tradeoffs] (1,2,3, from -litemind.com)
- WHY-Ask yourself “why” of what you have chosen to do and weed out poorly made plans.
- Set aside time to reflect on your decision. Sit with it.
- Ask yourself, “Will this decision be the right one for everyone involved? Is this choice good for me? Is this choice good for my family?”
- Imagine having made the decision. Imagine choosing one path & then the other. How do you feel? Go within to see how it makes you feel.
- Let go of the fear. Know and understand there is no “right” decision.
- Follow your gut instincts. If you have to talk yourself into something, it is usually going to lead to a bad situation.
- Take action. Any good action or direction trumps inaction. How will you move forward if you just continue to sit at the fork in the road
LOOKING FOR SIGNS OF DIRECTION
I laughed to myself as I came across this sign on the internet. I know it may sound funny, but I believe in signs. I have had experiences where passages in books, intention cards, magazine pages have not only been inspired, but answered my prayers. I know you may be skeptical, but here are a couple links to my stories–enjoy–https://yourhappyplaceblog.com/2013/01/02/tap-into-the-vision-for-your-life/
Funny article that said–Here is the sign you have been looking for. “Sometimes you have to stop worrying, wondering, and doubting. Have faith that things will work out, maybe not exactly how you planned–but perfectly.” -unknown