growth – yourhappyplaceblog

Deeper questions for growth

Published on April 17, 2017 by goforthegood1Leave a comment

I gathered some good stuff to help us grow with deeper questions. If you are seeking inner personal truths, direction for your life or just want to make sure you know what you want, here is some great info.

MindfulHappiness-JournalWriting From Martha Beck article:

You’re about to change your life. The more honest you are, the more you’ll find yourself doing what you love, with people you love, in places you love. You’ll realize that nothing really true is ever unloving, and nothing unloving is ever really true. That wild creature, your true self, will come to meet you, then trust you, then guide you home, one day at a time. Honestly.

Her question: Am I living my deepest truth right now? Journal it out.

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From a great article by Liz Kimball, Oprah

“You know who you are, and you know what you want.” -Lao Tzu

You have ‘shoulds’ disguised as wants.

Journal her following questions to see what comes up.

I should _______________ today because _________________.

I should _______________ this month because ___________________.

I should _______________ this year because ________________________.

But when someone’s voice deadens and they tell me that they need to stay at their company 5 more years…or collaborate with the fanciest person they know because they feel like they should, I know I am having a conversation with a person whose shoulds have drowned out the voice of their own soul.

And that soul voice is the one in which I’m most rigorously interested in, because it contains directions for how you are meant to evolve.

“There is something in every one of you that waits and listens for the sound of the genuine in yourself. It is the only true guide you will ever have.” -Howard Thurman

Her question: Today, the genuine sounds like ______________________________.

Social Psychology researchers and developers of the Self-Concordance Model of achievement Dr. Kennon M. Sheldon and Dr. Andrew J. Elliott found not only that we are more likely to put sustained effort into self-concordant goals (goals that are aligned with who we are and that make our hearts sing) and therefore are more likely to attain them, but we also gain deeper well-being when we actually accomplish them.

Her question: What secret dream am I keeping close to my heart?

Your soul is oriented by evolution–not targets–and cares much less about the particulars of what you do and much more about fulfilling what in you is wanting to grow.

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8 questions from Deepak Chopra

Who am I?

What do I want?

What’s my purpose in this life?

What sort of contribution do I want to make?

What are my unique skills?

Who are my heroes?

What is a meaningful relationship–what do I expect from one, and what do I give?

What am I grateful for?

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Soul Questions:

What do you do or have done in your life that makes you happy?

What have you always wanted to do or try, but were afraid to?

What values do you hold most important in your life?

What are your greatest strengths and talents?

What books and movies are your drawn to? This is a good question because you can see the patterns of what you put into your life. I found a few years ago that I only wanted to watch movies that left me feeling good. Evaluate the things you are putting in & make sure they are uplifting and leave you positive.

What answers are you seeking for your life?

How would you describe yourself to someone? This question will help you see What beautiful things would you say? What things you may find hard to face about yourself.

What do you feel you attract into your life? Positive or Negative?

What makes you feel ALIVE? This is a good question because it makes you evaluate the things you do, the people you associate, the places you venture, the hobbies you have, your beliefs…what makes you feel alive?

Do you like change? Answer this one honestly. smile. smile. I have found change to be what you make it. I have moved and moved & faced change time and time again. I learned to embrace it & at times miss it. It is like anything. It is what you make it. Change helps you see new things, try new experiences, meet new people, find places within yourself that feel exhilarated by change. Seek to embrace it.

What drains your energy? What recharges your energy? Are there people, activities, job requirements, daily tasks, expectations, etc. that drain your energy? Begin to notice these things and make the necessary changes to rid your life of toxic energy & fill in the spaces with things that light you up.

light painting (3 of 5) Well, I don’t want to overwhelm you with so many great questions, so this is it for today. I think this is a great start. I will follow-up with more questions at a later date.

Have a beautiful day. Know you are blessed and loved. Peace to you. -H

Spring Cleaning for the Soul 2

Published on March 6, 2017March 6, 2017 by goforthegood1Leave a comment

NEW TO YOU: Growth, Challenge, Change.

When most people decide they want or need to personally grow they look to those around them to learn from and then they also dive into the pages of good books. Reading has always been a well-spring for me personally. You can find educated people, people who have struggled and share their stories, adventurous people, people you can learn anything from. Books are a good starting point.

I also believe in just reaching out. If there is someone you want to learn something from–email them. The internet is a gift in that way, that you can connect with anyone. You know I have reached out to Catherine Johnson(who did Mamma Mia (she was WONDERFUL), shared musical ideas with Mika(never heard from him or his team), gone straight to book authors for ideas or museums for direction) Reach out. Learn. Grow.

ACTION: I have done my share of coaching classes, retreats, actual coaching of clients, but this tool I came across and thought you may benefit from. Its the ‘GROW’ tool: This may help you in any life decision. Go for it!

“Don’t go through life, grow through life.” -E Butterworth

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BEAUTIFUL ON THE INSIDE & OUT. Embrace and love your body. It is the most amazing thing you will ever own.

“You are an original, an individual, a masterpiece. Celebrate that; don’t let your uniqueness make you shy. Don’t be someone other than the wonder you are. Every star is important to the sky.” -Douglas Pagels

ACTION: “When you look at yourself in a mirror, do you like what you see, or do you judge your body and use the word to tell yourself lies? If you believe that you are not attractive enough, then you believe a lie, and you are using the word against yourself, against the truth.” -Migual Angel Ruiz

“Your body is your temple. Keep it pure and clean for the soul to reside in.” -BKS Iyengar

How do you take care of your body:

Take time to exercise

Make sleep a priority–7 to 8 hours at least

Eat well and savor it

Listen to pain

Slow down

Keep a journal because it is therapeutic

Read because it is relaxing and is also a good escape

Have personal self time

Unplug

Talk to yourself in a positive manner

Positive affirmations

Play. Do things you truly enjoy doing

Learn something new because it not only stimulates your brain, but it invigorates your life

Dont forget to hydrate! You need at least 8 x 8oz glasses

3ekmba SERVE

“We rise by lifting others.” -Robert Ingersoll. I LOVE this thought & it rings so true. Think about a time when you did something/anything for another person….YOU were lifted. My sweet daughter was running into the gas station to get me a drink & she always holds the door open for people who are coming and going. She lights up & one man gave a sweet gesture in return. She went up to the cashier to pay & he jumped in to pay. She lit up & he gave her a fist bump. She almost skipped out of the gas station & lit up as she shared the details of the story. Something so small (holding a door open) lit up his day and hers. We truly do rise by doing even little things for others.

“Spread LOVE everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving HAPPIER.” -Mother Teresa

ACTION:

Seek /create opportunities to serve.

Be the reason someone SMILES today.

Send someone an encouraging note.

Pay it forward. Be generous in opening a door, allowing someone to go in front of you in line, get your mom a drink. smile.

Ask God if there is some way you can serve another.

PLAY. FIND JOY. BELIEVE in MAGIC…be young at heart

” The heart that LOVES is always young.” -unknown. “To a young heart, everything is fun.” -Charles Dickens. “The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age.” -Aldus Huxley.

ACTION:

READ: Take time to read your favorite classic stories.

TINKER: Figure out how something works.

PLAY: Skip, Explore, Create, Be silly, climb a tree, do bubbles, collect rainbows, daydream

HAVE A PICNIC: eat outside, something you loved as a child. (chicken nuggets, yogurt, cheese puffs, etc), fly a kite, play a lawn game, look at the clouds, lay on a blanket.

CREATE: Make a card or something hand made and gift it to someone. Be CREATIVE: Doodle, dress-up, make-believe, have theme days/parties, tell a tale w voices.

COOK: Learn something new & get messy.

IMAGINE: use your creativity & make something colorful, bright and imaginative.

GO OUTSIDE: throw rocks, paint a rock, skip down a path, make something from nature, take a picture, breathe in the fresh air, play in the dirt, shoot an arrow.

SMILE & LAUGH: tell jokes, watch a funny movie.

DANCE: be free to move & play your favorite tunes.

NAP: Take a nap & not care what time it is.

Be CURIOUS: want to learn about something–stop & ask. Read up on a topic or ask an expert. learn, grow.

WONDER: See the magic everywhere. Life is awesome!

REMEMBER YOU ARE LOVE

What is the point to suffering?

Published on March 2, 2015March 2, 2015 by goforthegood1Leave a comment

Suffering. What is it & why is it essential to our growth?? I just read a great metaphor that goes along with this idea…“Accepting suffering seems to go against our instincts, even if we vaguely understand that acceptance is the currency that will procure our freedom. An ocean of ignorance, misunderstanding, and fear lies between our rejection of suffering and our acceptance of it. Crossing that ocean is the spiritual journey. It leads us from the shore of bewilderment to the shore of understanding, from fear to freedom.” -Elizabeth Lesser, The Seeker’s Guide

Isn’t that a beautiful image. To me it is like being caught in a thunderstorm upon the sea. Everywhere you look things are not clear, there is haze, there is pain, fear, there is misunderstanding. But all you can do is strive to go forward, to get through the storm. You go forward, through the suffering, through any struggle to see clearly what lies beyond. You finally make it out of the suffering and find a place of calm. I truly believe you must have a balance of suffering to instill an opening of growth.

Look at your own life—when you have suffered, what has been the outcome?? Did you feel you came out of the situation wiser? Did you follow your heart through the pain & in the end seemed to feel lighter? Did you find yourself in a moment of growth or reflection? I know for me personally, when the hardest days have hit, I was blessed to walk through it & feel stronger, to learn from the struggles & seek a higher direction. I look back and see how the suffering and struggles changed me & the lessons I learned along the way.

“Suffering occurs when your ideas about how things ought to be don’t match how they really are.” -Brad Warner

We go through life and have many moments and situations where we think things, ideas or people should match how we think things should be. When we place our own judgements, our own misconceptions, our own expectations upon things outside of ourselves, we are bound for suffering. ‘BOUND for SUFFERING’ this just hit me! When we expect things outside ourselves to be a certain way, we are almost setting ourselves up, we are tying & binding our heart to suffering. This is a very personal hard lesson for me. I get stuck expecting people to do certain things, to treat me a certain way, to respect and understand me, but this is a pathway to my own suffering. I can’t expect anything of anyone, but myself. This is an ongoing lesson for my life & I strive to grow in finding patience with this need. I have to be gentle and understand I am human!

The Buddha said, “The root of suffering is attachment.”

I think we as humans are experts at the relationships of attachment. I think most of us grow up and become attached to expectations, the future, our jobs, our status, our title, where & what we need to be doing, what others think, what ‘happiness’ or ‘success’ equals….there are so many directions and attachments that can and will lead to suffering. I think when we are able to let go of the [FEAR] of material attachments, to external obligations, and take the time to connect with our real, deep-rooted roots[DIVINE LOVE]…then suffering will be nothing but the lessons we learn and the roads we have walked beyond.

Have a beautiful day. Peace to you. -H

Change. Grow. Fly.

Published on August 20, 2013August 20, 2013 by goforthegood11 Comment

I watched many mothers this morning taking picture after picture of every moment of the first day of school this morning. I watched a mother well up in tears, while another was getting every possible shot of her children by the school bell, by the principal, in line waiting with the other 20 students, all worried about their first day. It was mostly lots of faces of nervous children, while their mothers were trying to snap and hold on to any piece of their little child that they could.

It was definitely a lot of emotions that swirled around. My husband and I were interviewing all the kids in our daughters class, trying to erase the worries, trying to help unify them in any thought that they were all in the same boat…nervous!!! We enjoyed every moment, knowing that within our little girls heart–she was terrified. She began her morning in tears, butterflies whirled in her stomach & she was quiet, oh so quiet. She was filled with tiny worries, where do I go, how do I find my way?? All I could do is reassure her that we would walk her through it. We would be there every step of the way.

It is funny how life goes…it is a constant learning game–we are always trying to figure out where we fit, we are always trying to find out where we belong, we are always trying to find the road we belong on. Life is a constant whirl of unknown—from when we are young & experiencing our first day in elementary school to trying to identify a passion, seeking the right job, moving to a new city, meeting new people…it is always changing, but with change comes strength, comes a different feeling from the old, the comfortable.

I love the thought, “If nothing ever changed, there would be no butterflies.” While we were walking our daughter Kate to school this morning, she began to hold her tummy in nervousness. I explained her tummy pains were like little nervous butterflies fluttering about & all she needs to do is let them fly & the worries will go away.

Change is inevitable, so we must take the day, embrace the differences & see everything in a different perspective.

Don’t be afraid to FLY.